


Hush

by domini_moonbeam



Category: The Covenant (2006)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mental Instability, Multi, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Polyamory, Romance, Sex, Suicide Attempt, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:13:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 15
Words: 42,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25164481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/domini_moonbeam/pseuds/domini_moonbeam
Summary: After high school and on to college, Pogue and Caleb have their own places and Tyler and Reid share an apartment. Reid has a secret. Multiple pairings, M/M, dark themes galore but always heavily romantic.
Relationships: Caleb Danvers/Reid Garwin, Caleb Danvers/Reid Garwin/Pogue Parry/Tyler Simms, Pogue Parry/Tyler Simms
Comments: 5
Kudos: 18





	1. Idiot

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is a fic I wrote back in 2013ish but since I live over here on Ao3, I wanted to move it over. Forgive me if it's rough! My Covenant fics were my firsts. I don't know if it needs to be stated--but I don't own these characters.

“Po!” Reid yelled over the thrum of the music and voices, holding a beer in one hand and a shot of tequila in the other. He was mostly certain that one of them belonged to someone else. “Why are our parties always at your place?” the blond demanded, blinking a little slowly. They were coming up on 1am and even Caleb looking only vaguely conscious.

“Because you and Ty live in that shitty little apartment,” Pogue began, pausing to swallow his beer and allow Tyler a sound of offense. The youngest was currently leaned into Caleb’s side, he was known to be a cuddly drunk. “And Cay doesn’t want you puking on his couch again.”

Reid smiled slowly at the memory. It wasn’t really a memory so much as it was the accounting he’d heard from Tyler the next day. Supposedly he’d been doing whiskey shots and eating red hots and by the end of it, he’d spewed all over Caleb’s couch. Needless to say, the eldest had a new couch and was no longer housing parties.

Caleb smiled and pushed away from the counter, unlacing Tyler from his arm to move toward the end of tile and the opening of the living room willed with guests and liquor. He stopped near Reid, close, and tugged the tequila shot from those pale fingers. Reid watched, more than a little drunk and thus more enchanted than usual, as those lips moved, parting and pressing cold glass to the lower lip before throwing back the liquor. Reid watched his friend swallow and moaned softly at the sight of it. Caleb licked his lips and then leaned in even closer. “Feel free to vomit all over Pogue’s place.” He smiled and walked away, into the mass toward a particularly patient looking redhead with an impressive cleavage.

Reid laughed and took a long drink of his beer. “Shit, that man’s a tease.”

Pogue snorted. “You started it that time he finally kissed you and you punched him.”

Reid looked up at the taller man, raising an eyebrow. “He told you about that?”

Pogue laughed and draped an arm around Tyler, tugging him along toward the living room as well. “He had to explain that split lip.” He lingered to run fingertips along Reid’s neck, before curling his digits around to grace spine. “You wanna come up stairs with us?” Tyler smiled sloppily and Reid laughed at the glazed look in his best friend’s eyes.

Reid smacked Pogue’s shoulder and then pushed away from them, walking away into the living room first. “No thanks, boys. We’ve got so much tail in this house, I ought to try something new.” He lost his beer somewhere, to someone, and didn’t think much on it.

He pulled his shirts off in layers, still walking slowly through the living room. He stepped out of his shoes and paused to lean his bare back against a wall, body of lean muscles wrapped tight in pale skin. He caught Caleb smiling at him over the redhead’s shoulder. _‘The strip down’_ as Reid had started to call it, always worked. Already a handful of people were watching him, most just thinking he was so drunk he didn’t know he was still in a crowded room. He knew. With a smile, he dropped his socks, bare feet on the carpet and started slowly toward the stairs, hands working open the buckle of his belt.

He pulled the length of leather free and dropped it on the stairs, walking up the steps while working his buttons and fly open. He found an empty room and walked in. Before the door swung completely shut, someone pushed it open again. Reid glanced back, heavy eyelids giving the man in the doorway a once over. Tall and broad shouldered. He looked like a running back. The blond smiled and turned to face him. “You’ll do,” he muttered, fingers gesturing him closer and the door closing firmly behind him and clicking with a lock.

* * *

In just fifteen minutes it felt like the whole party had mellowed out. Caleb was sitting on the couch, the music softer now, quieter. A large group had left, thinning out the remaining occupants of the living room to mostly sleeping bodies. The redhead was in his lap, straddling his hips. He dropped his head against the back of the couch and moaned. She had freed him from his jeans and was now moving slowly up and down, knees on either side of his hips and his hands gently on her thighs, rubbing soft skin with his thumbs.

A deep shout burst from somewhere upstairs. The redhead didn’t seem to hear it but Caleb opened his eyes, staring up at the ceiling. He was certain he heard a thin string of laughter. It was one of Reid’s laughs. Not his soulful one, his youthful one, or even his mocking laugh. That was the laugh Reid spat when he was on edge, when he was feeling dark and angry.

Caleb held the redhead’s thighs so that she would stop moving and closed his eyes to hide the flash of black beneath his lids when he honed his senses in on that sound, to hear Reid clearly. “You little bitch,” someone else said in that room upstairs and then he heard the sound of a thick fist colliding with a face.

“Shit,” Caleb exhaled and lifted the woman off his lap, dumping her onto the couch and pulling his pants up on his way up the stairs.

A thump against a wall, the sound of a table smacking against the floor. More of that awful laugh only wet now.

Caleb reached the door but found it locked. Clenching his teeth, he slammed his shoe against it and knocked the door off its hinges. He wasn’t sure where to put his eyes first, on the large half-naked man with bloody knuckles that he’d never seen before or on the blond he’d spent the better part of his life looking out for, currently bleeding from the face and lying on the floor naked. Reid spit blood on the carpet, his cheek split over that sharp bone and his nose broken.

The big guy with the knuckles snarled at Caleb for intruding. “Get out, man!” he yelled.

As if it were an invitation, Caleb stepped into the room, the door swinging weakly behind him. He stepped over Reid on the floor and gave the larger guy a hard shove, knocking him back into the wall. “Are you joking? If I don’t hear something that makes sense in the next five seconds I’m going to throw you out that window.”

Reid reached out, grabbing half-blind at Caleb’s ankle, rolling onto his side and coughing up more red onto the carpet. Still, his blood slick mouth curved into a smirk. “Cay… I can handle this,” he muttered. It sounded more assertive in his head.

“The fuck you can,” Caleb snorted.

“He bit me!” the man with the knuckles shouted, not having lost much of his anger.

“What?” Caleb demanded, his face scrunching into some confusion.

Pogue appeared in the doorway, probably drawn from his own bed by the sound of splintering wood. “What’s going on here?” he shouted when he saw the state of Reid. It wasn’t unlike the younger blond to get himself into a fight he couldn’t win and take the beating, but he was usually clothed.

“I bit him,” Reid agreed with a long sloppy smile that turned mean at the corners, one eye that wasn’t in the process of swelling shut glared passed Caleb at the larger man. “I told you not to put it in my mouth.”

The man with the bloody knuckles snarled back at the blond on the floor, forgetting entirely the dark-haired man between them. “You don’t want it? Then you shouldn’t have a mouth made for-” Caleb’s fist collided with the stranger’s cheek, knocking him back and into the wall face first.

“Get him out of the way,” Caleb ordered and Pogue quickly grabbed Reid under the arms and pulled him up from the floor and onto the bed.

“Shit sweetheart, how much blood do you have to spare?” the older blond muttered, looking at the red all over his floor and sheets.

Caleb grabbed the stranger by the heels and started dragging, pulling him right out of the room and into the hall. He came to and started shouting just before they reached the stairs but the Caleb didn’t hesitate to shove him down them, ignoring the sickly crack of a forearm before he hit the bottom. Stepping over the heap of now wailing man, he opened the front door and then came back, grabbing up the stranger by the legs again and dragging him right out and onto the lawn. He paused there, under the dark sky and cradled in the chill of early morning. “You touch one of my brothers again and I will throw you out a window next time," Caleb said clearly over the other man’s wailing before walking inside and closing the door. The redhead was gone. Just as well, after that show he wasn’t exactly interested in getting off.

When he came back up the stairs Pogue was waiting in the hallway. They exchanged looks before the blond went back to his own room and Caleb pushed the now swaying door open and then closed it as best he could. Reid was on the bed and his face was still a mess. “You want to keep that broken nose?” Caleb asked, standing beside the mattress and lifting Reid’s jaw to get a better look at the damage. He frowned pointedly. Trouble had always been in Reid’s nature but it always got worse the closer they got to the holidays.

Reid pushed his friend’s hand away and looked up at the ceiling. “Leave it.”

“What happened?” Caleb asked, voice forever stern, and sat down on the bed beside him, leaning back against the headboard and pillows.

Reid smiled but there was no happiness in it. “I bit him.”

“Reid…” Caleb muttered. It was common knowledge for most of Reid’s lovers that he didn’t give blowjobs or particularly enjoy receiving them for that matter but that didn’t mean random strangers should know his aversion.

“I told him I would,” he snapped. “I warned him not to try to put it there.”

“Then how did it end up there?” that dark voice demanded.

Reid shrugged, obviously tired. Between his drinks and his beating he was spent. “Pinned me. Fucker's faster than you’d think,” he muttered sleepily.

Caleb closed his eyes to keep from cringing. He draped an arm over the other man’s shoulders. “You could have stopped him without biting him.”

Reid smirked, blood in the corners of his mouth. “You said not to Use so much.” He liked to throw that in Caleb’s face when he got the chance, but after ascending he had made an honest effort to save his power-or rather, the amount of power his body could use before it wore him down. It wasn’t that he was afraid of dying early exactly, it had just occurred to him after the Chase incident that if he let himself grow withered and weak he wouldn’t be able to protect his brothers.

“You’re an ass,” Caleb muttered, opening his eyes to let them flash black, resetting his friend’s nose. The rest he left. He didn’t like leaving the rest of those bruises and bleeding lip to heal slowly but if that oaf called the cops it would be best if the proof of his misconduct didn’t just vanish overnight.

“You love my ass,” Reid murmured, almost asleep.

Caleb sighed heavily. “I’m an idiot.”


	2. Steam

Tyler found them at the university cafeteria. Pogue was currently working his way through a burger and fries while Caleb spoke, a small pile of brochures on the table in front of them. “Where’s Reid?” Tyler asked, pulling out a chair and dropping his bag on the floor.

“Still in class,” Pogue mumbled around his mouthful.

“Assuming he went…” Caleb muttered.

There was a pause of quiet. Reid always got testy during the holidays and in the thick of November, it was a miracle if he made it to his classes. Really, when Tyler thought about it, he wasn’t sure how Reid managed to pass his fall classes. At least his black eye and busted lip had finally healed. He’d been insufferable the last few weeks, putting on the pity show every time a cute girl passed by.

“What are these?” Tyler asked, picking up one of the brochures with a picture of a snowcapped mountain and skiers and then another with a couple tanning on a tropical beach.

“Christmas vacation,” Pogue spoke again after taking a large bite.

“We were thinking, since Reid has persisted in hating Christmas for the past decade, we could all go someplace else this year, away from families...and innocent bystanders,” Caleb said, tossing a couple more of the perspective locales in Tyler’s direction.

The youngest laughed. “He’s not that bad.”

“Last night he started a fight at Colson Grill and got us all banned,” Caleb pointed out while looking over another brochure, this one for a resort in the mountains.

“He didn’t start that fight,” Tyler countered loyally. “Garren Wills-”

“Garren threw the first punch but you know who started that fight,” Caleb said firmly.

Pogue sighed tiresomely after taking a drink of his coke. “He wants to get hit,” he commented. Both of his brothers looked at him in surprise. Pogue shrugged one leather clad shoulder at their expressions. “He starts fights about things he doesn’t care about, always with guys bigger than him or with friends there and then he takes the beating. Haven’t you noticed? Every time his face heals he finds another guy with thick fists to mess it up again. At this rate he’s going to be a damn ugly old man.”

Caleb frowned. He’d noticed the trajectory of Reid’s fights but he hadn’t wanted to think on it. If they went somewhere else for Christmas maybe he could get over whatever his damage was about the season. It had started when they were teens, his mood swings around this time of year.

“How is he when you two go to your parents?” Caleb changed the subject, looking at Tyler. Since Reid’s dad had passed away when he was young and his mom had stopped wanting to do holidays, Reid had spent every Christmas at Tyler’s since they were fourteen.

Tyler shrugged. “Bored. We play a lot of video games and watch movies. He gets kind of quiet and… I don’t know. Docile?” He made a face at the word he was saying, not sure how it could fit Reid. “I think he just gets depressed.”

Pogue coughed to quiet them and then lifted his arm to wave at someone. “Over here,” he called and Tyler looked back to see Reid crossing the cafeteria. Tyler didn’t like when they talked about Reid in private, mostly he didn’t like when he let himself get sucked into it.

“What’s all this?” Reid smiled as he sat down, reaching across the table to take Pogue’s soda. “You two going on a honeymoon?” He smirked at Pogue and Caleb.

“We were thinking we’d go someplace fun for the holiday break.”

Reid nodded a little absently then. “Yeah, sounds cool. You guys have fun.”

Pogue pushed his plate with fries across the table to the blond with his coke. “We were thinking we’d all go. Be more fun with the four of us.”

Reid looked up and there was a bit of dark skepticism and something sadder there. He looked tired and returned his attention to the fries. “Tyler goes to his mom’s every Christmas,” he said simply.

Tyler shifted in his seat and pulled out his phone. “I’m sure she won’t care. Come on, we’re not in prep school anymore, I doubt she expects us to show up every holiday for the rest of our lives.” He started texting and Reid eyed his phone as he typed.

Caleb couldn’t help but watch his friend carefully. There was something wrong with the amount of emotion shifting beneath that mask of indifference. It was as though he didn’t want to get his hopes up. It left Caleb uncomfortably confused. If Reid didn’t like going to Tyler’s then why did he go every year? “So,” the eldest spoke to catch the blonde’s attention. “Where do you want to go?” He nudged his chin toward the brochures on the table.

Reid shrugged. “I don’t care. Someplace without snow.” He picked up a few more fries and then stood. “I’ve got another class. Catch you boys later.”

“We’re barbecuing tonight,” Caleb reminded. “My place.”

Reid waved back in acknowledgement and then left.

“Well, at least he didn’t flip a table or anything,” Pogue muttered, reaching across the table to retrieve what was left of his soda.

* * *

When Tyler came back to their apartment, Reid was already home. He knew instantly because the door wasn’t locked and his best friend's jacket was a heap on the back of the couch.

“Reid,” Tyler called, dropping his bag near the other man’s jacket and pushing open the Reid’s bedroom door. He heard the shower in the adjoining bathroom turn off.

“Yeah?” Reid replied, voice echoing from inside tile just before he opened the door and stepped out in a cloud of steam, rubbing his towel into his hair and not seeming to notice the water dripping down the rest of him.

Reid had a habit of not noticing his own nudity and Tyler always appreciated that. “Nothing. I thought you’d be the one to make us late tonight but you’ve already showered.”

The blond smiled, towel now left over his head like a hood attached to nothing, shadowing those sharp features. “If you want I can go outside and roll around in the dirt, buy you a little time to catch up.”

Tyler shook his head and laughed, stripping off his sweater and shirt and starting toward his best friend with an eye for the shower behind him. “Oh, I talked to my mom.” Tyler started and couldn’t help but notice the way those long muscles tensed. “She was kind of bummed out but she said we could do whatever we wanted.”

Reid nodded slowly as though these words might have some deeper meaning. He slid the towel from his hair and shrugged. “And what do you want to do, Baby Boy?”

Tyler took the damp towel from his friend’s hands before it could end up on the floor. “Let’s go to the beach,” he said easily. He hated how unhappy Reid got around this part of the year. If he could change it, he would.

Reid looked at him strangely through those wet tossed strands of his hair. “Are you sure?”

Tyler smiled a little nervously and touched his brother’s cheek. “Yeah. Come on. It’s just a couple weeks. We’ll go to the beach, get drunk and sun burned and maybe even laid.”

Reid smiled slowly at first, and then wider until the excitement and relief seemed to consume his features. “Maybe?” He laughed and turned toward Tyler, pushing the other body back and into the steamy bathroom. “I’ll have you and Po and Cay there, how could I not get laid?” he said confidently and before Tyler could respond his face moved forward to swallow the space between them, colliding lips to lips. He opened Tyler’s mouth easily with his own and delved his tongue deep into that warmth, his naked body pushing the half-naked one against the counter.

Tyler umphed and for a moment tensed as though he might resist. If he ever resisted, Reid would have backed away. He didn’t roughhouse with Tyler during sex the way he did with Pogue. Usually he didn’t even make the first move. In all their years of playing at friends and lovers, Reid had only initiated a handful of times and in their teen years of inexperience, he had been insufferably hesitant. Reid would jump into bed with strangers, men and women, but when it came to his brother’s he had always hesitated, flirted, and teased. He had refused to be Tyler’s first, even when the youngest had asked outright. Luckily Pogue had not been so hesitant but to this day Tyler didn’t understand why or how Reid could be so careful with the ones he loved and so careless with himself in every other aspect of his life.

Tyler moaned against that mouth and pushed his chest against that damp one, making sure his friend knew this was wanted. He hated how Reid treated him sometimes, like he was fragile. He reached down between them and ran his fingers along the wet skin of Reid’s thigh, up those jumping muscles until his hand cupped the other man’s sex.

Reid groaned and pulled his mouth from his best friend’s only long enough to move his lips and tongue to his neck, kissing, biting and licking from the back of his ear down to his collarbone. His fingers worked open those jeans with expertise and pushed them down, shuddering pleasantly when Tyler wiggled his hips to let them fall. He paused for a moment, to just be against him, to have that hand stroking him while he tasted that neck, and then he grabbed those thighs and lifted Tyler onto the counter.

His fingers were in Reid’s hair, pressing at the back of his neck. He moaned when he felt fingers pushing into him, stretching him. “Yes.” Tyler moaned, curling his neck to press his cheek into Reid’s hair and have his mouth hovering near his ear. “Please.”

Reid smiled, that playful wicked turn of lips. “You beg so easy, Baby Boy,” he whispered huskily.

“Sh-Shut up and fuck me.” He whimpered, fingers digging into Reid’s shoulders when he complied and moaning louder when the blond started to thrust against him.

Tyler felt the cold wall of glass against his back when he was pushed into the mirror and his vision blurred when Reid’s hand wrapped around his cock between them, thrusting and stroking almost in unison. It wasn’t long before Tyler was rocking against him, lifting his hips to roll his ass against those deep strokes.

They hadn’t had sex until they moved into this apartment a year and a half ago for college. Before that it had been only heavy make out sessions and hand jobs. Tyler had once, and only once, tried to blow Reid. He’d persisted. He’d wanted to practice. Reid had said no but he was drunk and after some raunchy coaxing, he’d given in, letting Tyler open his pants and settle between his knees. He’d barely gotten Reid hard in his mouth before his friend had jolted upright and away. He hadn’t said anything. He’d just stared at Tyler like he’d woken him from a nightmare and then left. Reid had left their dorm for two weeks that time and then when he returned it had been like nothing had happened. To be fair, Pogue had warned him that Reid had an aversion to blow jobs before he’d pushed, but some part of Tyler’s pride had wanted to be the exception.

His breath came out hard and his whole body tensed on the counter when he came, shooting his lust between their bodies. A few thrusts later Reid had joined him, spasming against his chest and cumming inside of him.

Tyler panted and closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the mirror. “You still managed to make us late…” he muttered with a grin.

Reid rubbed his face against his brother’s neck. “But you have to admit, it was better than rolling in the dirt.”


	3. Tease

Reid and Tyler were late, Caleb noticed, but they were always late. Or, at least, Reid was always late. When Caleb walked through the open slider doors and onto the back porch he saw Pogue sliding his phone back into his pocket before picking up the tongs and laying the steaks on the grill. They sizzled and a small burst of steam and smoke lifted toward the evening sky.

“They’re on their way,” Pogue said, always calm, and reached toward Caleb for the beer he’d gone into the kitchen to get. With a small smile his best friend handed over one of the two he’d grabbed. Even though Po had said he didn’t want one, Caleb had known he would just end up drinking his instead. “Baby Boy said he’s on for the beach this christmas. Better pick a spot and make some calls,” Pogue said, nudging his chin skyward to the clouds as though Caleb weren’t aware that it was cold out. It hadn’t been his idea to barbecue but Pogue had insisted that there was no other way of cooking.

From the look of the grey sky and the sharp chill, it wouldn’t surprise Caleb if it started snowing tonight. And once it started it would set in until spring. When he heard the front door open and close inside the house and the other two men talking on their way toward the back, he expected Reid to come out complaining about the cold. Despite his preference for layers of clothing, he had never been a fan of winter. Caleb wasn’t even sure if his mood was a product of the holidays or the temperature but either way, they’d go someplace different this christmas and find out.

The blond came through the backdoors and onto the porch, hat, gloves and jacket still on and a sly smile on his face when he sidled up beside Caleb, muttering something half-hearted about the weather and taking the newly opened beer from his hand. “It’s not my fault we’re late,” Reid insisted.

Tyler blushed and nudged him as he passed on his way toward the barbecue and Pogue. “Shut up, Reid.”

“What?” Reid smirked. “You drive slow,” he said between sips, handing the bottle back to Caleb. “So where are we going this christmas? No where with lions.”

Caleb couldn’t help but smile. “Lions?”

“Yeah. Or crocs. I don’t want to get eaten,” Reid said casually enough.

Pogue snorted and flipped a piece of meat.

“Lets just pick an island,” Tyler suggested, always the one for diplomacy and keeping them on subject.

“Without crocs,” Reid reminded promptly.

“How about one of those places with the cabins out on the water.”

“What about sharks?” Caleb asked, pointedly looking at Reid. “Are you going to veto all places with sharks?”

“Psh, I’m not afraid of a fish,” he remarked with a little smirk and an upturned jaw. Their eyes met and Caleb wasn’t sure he’d even see Reid look so, light. He smiled easily and the darkness was almost gone from those blue eyes.

“Fuck it’s cold out here,” Reid complained and looked away, glancing at his other friends. He took a step toward the barbecue and gave Pogue a little shove. “Learn another way to cook or let Cay do it next time. I’m not going to stand out here when it starts snowing.”

Pogue gave him a look that involved scrunching half his face. “What are you talking about? It’s barely even fall.”

“The hell it is,” Reid snapped playfully. “The meat’s probably going to freeze as soon as you take it off the grill.”

“Stop your bitchen or you’ll be eating potato chips for dinner,” Pogue replied, pointing the tongs at his younger friend.

Reid smiled and reached for Caleb’s beer again, this time the eldest was already holding it out for him.

The discussion of island getaways became heated. All tropical islands in south america were being vetoed by Reid on the thin argument of crocodiles which was starting to make Tyler red in the face with irritation. Caleb occasionally offered up another suggestion only to hear the two bicker about it, Reid finding ways to shoot them down though the little smile in the corner of his mouth suggested he was doing it for sport at this point.

Tyler had started to suspect this as well, fists balled in frustration. He was just about to accuse the blond when Reid’s expression changed, eyes losing focus and hand raising to point one thinly gloved finger at the sky. Large white flakes were slowly filling the darkening sky. “That’s my queue,” Reid said with a triumphant grin and turned on his heel for the door. “I’ll get the PS3 warmed up for you guys.”

He walked inside and slid the door shut behind himself.

Caleb smiled in his wake and Tyler huffed. “What the hell. I thought he wanted to go to a beach.”

Pogue laughed. “Just pick whichever one you want, Baby Boy. He’s just playin with you.”

Caleb sighed at his empty hands, realizing that the blond had absconded with his beer. “I’m gonna get another one,” he muttered before walking to the sliding door. Tyler and Pogue were already re-discussing the merits of cabins versus hotels. He closed the door behind him to keep the growing cold out.

Reid was in the kitchen in the midst of retrieving another beer for himself, he smiled when he saw Caleb, knowing that the beer he’d just finished was the one he’d take from the eldest. He pulled a second bottle from Pogue’s fridge and put it on the counter. “You’re afraid of crocodiles and lions?” Caleb asked, voice dark and uninterested as usual.

Reid rolled a shoulder and popped the top off his bottle. “As much as anyone else I guess. Who wants to get eaten?”

Caleb smiled wider. “Some people don’t mind being eaten.”

Reid frowned a little but it was accompanied by a lifted eyebrow. He turned, leaning back against the counter and looking through lashes at the taller dark haired man in front of him. He’d spent almost is whole life with Caleb. They were never as close as he and Tyler, never as comfortable as he and Pogue. “Is that why you’ve never made a move on me? I won’t let you blow me...or won’t blow you?” His question was quiet, his voice low and his eyes unyielding.

Caleb smiled but it was thin and a little bitter. He hadn’t picked up the beer from the counter. He slid forward in that space of tile, until he stood so close to the blond that he was almost cornered against the counter and yet he wasn’t touching him at all. “You don’t know what I like, Reid,” Caleb said darkly, so close that a whisper was thunder. “And I did make a move.”

Reid resisted the urge to shiver, resisted the impulse to push his hips forward from where they leaned against linoleum to rub against Caleb’s. They’d never made it past that first kiss so many years ago. It had taken so long to get to that point. He’s been making out with Tyler for years and slept with Pogue before he ever even got to that kiss with Caleb. It still made his skin tingle to think about it and his eyes drifted to those lips. “You still whining about that busted lip?” He tried to smile around the joke, one of his biggest regrets wrapped in the bitter arms of his greatest shame.

He watched Caleb’s mouth turn with that little smile. It was a mystery. He never knew if there was any joy in that smirk or if it was just for show. Honestly, Reid had never understood Caleb. Not even for a moment in all their lives. He had never apologized for punching him. He’d never even tried to explain. What would have been the point? He had told himself then that it would blow over, that Caleb would try again someday. But he hadn’t and out of the same stubbornness, neither had Reid. So there they stood, a breath a part, so close that they could hear each others pulses and yet neither could close that gap. It was a war and Reid wondered if they were both winning or losing.

The door to the backyard slid open, letting in a gust of wind and Pogue followed by Tyler. “Food’s ready.”

Reid watched the slight smile in the corners of Caleb’s mouth change, turning into something more casual as he turned away, picking up his beer from the other counter and whistling at the platter of meat. Reid lifted his own bottle to his lips and took a drink. Sometimes he was certain that whatever their war was, he was losing.

* * *

Reid was always the last to wake up. Being last was a habit of his, he supposed, but at least he wasn’t the youngest. Tyler was downstairs, probably already attached to the PS3 or making breakfast and Caleb had gone to a class. Rubbing the back of his head and ruffling already messy hair, he walked into the bathroom. The sound of the running shower didn’t stop him from entering.

Pogue poked his head around the half wall of tile to see who was standing at the sink before going back to the water and soap. “Good morning, sunshine,” he said over the sound of water in the drain.

Reid leaned over the sink to look at himself in the mirror. He went through the motions, not entirely sure why he’d walked into the bathroom. His partial conversation with Caleb had been bothering him all night and remained in his thoughts even when he woke. “What’s Cay into?” He heard himself ask before he really decided to. Caleb had said that Reid didn’t even know what he liked. It was true. They had a first kiss and then Reid slugged him in the mouth.

He’d put it away in the back of his thoughts for years but now he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

The water turned off. “What do you mean?” Pogue asked, sounding cautiously casual but with a hint of curiosity. He walked into view in the mirror and Reid took a lecherous moment to smirk at that drenched sculpted body before he took the towel from the hook and started drying off.

Reid shrugged, leaning into the counter and still watching the other through the reflective glass rather than turning around and facing him. “I don’t know...kinky shit, you know? What’s his deal?”

Pogue paused in his drying and then licked his lips before slinging the towel over his head and starting on his hair. “You could ask him.”

Reid groaned and turned around, swaying for a moment before crossing his arms. “Never mind,” he said and then started for the door. When he started to open it, it closed again, Pogue’s hand flat against the wood and Reid could feel wet strands of his hair touching his naked neck. “Why do you want to know?” Pogue asked in that low patient voice that both maddened and soothed the smaller blond. “I’m not going to tell you stories about what he and I do,” he said clearly, mouth close to Reid’s ear then. “Do you know how many times Cay and Tyler have asked about your first time, wanting to hear that story?”

Reid turned around in that small space to look up at his friend with sharp blue eyes, widened by a fraction with fear he hadn’t known he had in him. His first time on bottom felt like a lifetime ago. It had been awkward at best. He hadn’t been able to stop shaking and it had taken a lot of patience on Pogue’s side--luckily Pogue had never had a shortage on patience when it came to his loved ones and Reid had been persistent that despite all his nerves, he wanted to do it. “What did you tell them?” Reid all but whispered, heart pounding in his chest. That had been an embarrassing weekend. He had cried for fucks sake.

Pogue smiled, soft and playful as usual again. “I told them that it was pretty much what they’d expect. You insisted you knew everything, rode me like a damn horse and then complained about the lack of food in my fridge.”

Reid actually shivered in relief, rolling his eyes at his friend’s need to cause him panic. “So that’s your way of telling me you won’t talk about what Cay likes in bed?”

“That’s my way of telling you, that I won’t tell you anything he wouldn’t want you to know, so you might as well just ask him.” He smirked and stood straight, letting go of the door.

“You’re a dick,” Reid spat with less irritation than he would have liked. “I just wanted to know if he...You know, he’s a tease.”

Pogue laughed then and took those few steps away, deeper into the bathroom and toward the mirror. “A tease makes you think things they won’t do...Caleb has never teased in his life.”

Reid licked his lips and shifted from one foot to the other. What the fuck was he waiting for? What was it he wanted to know? If Caleb wasn’t teasing, then he was interested in Reid, it still didn’t change anything since neither of them would make that move.

“He doesn’t like getting punched in the face for kissing you, turns out,” Pogue jabbed with a smirk, picking up his toothbrush and putting the toothpaste on the bristles.

“Yeah, yeah. I got a class. I’ll see you at Jacksons tonight?” It had taken them the first year of college to pick out a new bar but they’d finally settled on a dive off route 92.

“Hey, Reid.” Pogue called to stop him halfway out the door. He seemed to hesitate for a second before curiosity had him asking. “Why did you punch him that time?”

Reid paused and for a moment considered telling him the truth. If he ever tried to explain it to anyone, it would have been Pogue. He shrugged instead and smiled lazily. “You know me,” he said before leaving.

Pogue watched him go. He always knew when Reid was lying or hiding, unfortunately it was so often that he rarely tried to pry anymore. Reid wasn’t the kind of guy you could push secrets out of. If he wanted to talk, he would. But, sadly, Reid had always been a creature of action over words.


	4. Breathe

Caleb rolled his knuckles against the apartment door but before the sound could even resound inside, Pogue had reached out and turned the knob. He smiled at the dark haired man’s judging scowl. “What? You know they never lock the damn thing,” Po muttered with a smirk and walked past him and into the small dwelling.

“If you’re a burglar, turn your ass around man,” Came Tyler’s voice from around the corner. He was sitting on the couch with his text books spread out on the coffee table and a pen bouncing against his thigh. He had always been a last minute studier. If he was this tense he probably had an exam the next morning.

Pogue walked in first and dropped himself comfortably into one of the chairs while Caleb walked past the living room to peek into Reid’s bedroom. It was a mess but it was empty. “Where is he?” Caleb asked.

Tyler looked up then, surveying his brothers in attendance to realize who Caleb meant. He sighed and looked down at his text book again. “He went out. I needed to study,” he said the last sentence pointedly and Pogue smiled.

“Do you know where?” Caleb asked, moving toward the door again already. He was never one to get in the ways of his friends studies.

“Uh, yeah, he said something about seeing if the pool was still open,” Tyler muttered, eyes skimming a page. When Caleb opened the front door again the youngest seemed to wake from his studies, looking up quickly. “Oh, hey, my mom called. Turns out she does want us to be there for christmas, something about tradition and me living far away now...yadda yadda,” he said, waving that pen in annoyance at the parent that wasn’t there. “So I guess it’ll just be you and Pogue on the beach next week.” He looked down at his books again and his pen returned to the page of a notebook. “Bring us back some sand or something,” he muttered, back to reading.

Caleb nodded slowly. “Yeah, sure,” he said before looking at Pogue once more, it was obvious his friend was comfortable in his seat and had no intention of leaving just yet--a shame for Tyler’s grades because Po did not have the same respect for studying as Caleb.

He closed the door and walked back down the hall toward the stairs. Honestly, when he got in his car he had intended to drive home. The gym was on the way. He saw it but hadn’t really thought to go until he found himself parked and getting out of the car. The lot was empty and the street growing dark. The only light he saw in the windowed front of the building was the lobby and in it he could see janitor buffing the floors. He frowned. The place was closed. Logic would have most men thinking Reid had gone elsewhere. But Reid was not bound by logic.

Caleb tapped on the glass door and the man came over, using a key on his belt to open it. “You practicing for a match too?” The older man grunted before Caleb could even speak.

“I just need to get my friend.”

The janitor looked him over, as though considering it before sighing and stepping back. “Go ahead. I’m done here by eleven. I told your friend he has to be out by then.”

Caleb nodded and passed him, wondering how much Reid paid this guy for a late night swim.

Gyms were a different place at night. Empty and dark and full of shadows. If those were things that bothered Caleb, it might have been eerie. The pool room was washed in moonlight and the sound of the body doing laps echoed against the tiles and high ceiling. Caleb stood near one end and watched Reid move through the water. Lean body, pale in that dark water and sending flurries of ripples out in either directions. He watched him do two laps, waiting for him to stop. He didn’t. There was a calm for a stretch of seconds every time he reached a wall, his body hitting it and curling under the water to push off again, streaming beneath the surface to let the room fall into silence before he surfaced again.

Caleb took off his jacket and set it on a bench. He pulled out his phone and started to text Po to let him know that he found Reid but before he could send the message he realized that the silence at Reid’s turn had not ended. There was no sound in the room. The seconds in the usual rhythm had passed without the surface breaking.

Caleb looked up to see the dark water stilling, the last ripples working their way out to the edges. He took quick steps to the side to look into the water. Reid’s body was easy to find, light skin and blond hair. He was drifting to the bottom and just laying there. Caleb felt a wave of ice spread over his skin. He watched Reid blink underwater, staring up. He watched him exhale slowly, bubbles rising up to the surface and then stillness followed. He dropped his phone and felt his eyes go wide when he watched his brother inhale suddenly beneath water, body spasming at the bottom of those depths when the liquid flooded his lungs.

Without thinking, he jumped into the pool, body cutting a line through the water and swimming straight for Reid. He could see him struggling on the bottom, fists clenched and limbs kicking out, needing to move though he seemed to do nothing to propel himself toward the surface. He had stilled just before Caleb reached him. As soon as he grabbed that limp wrist and jerked the unmoving body toward himself, Caleb’s eyes flashed black and they were on the tiles beside the pool, water splashing against the floor around them.

Caleb inhaled and for a split second found himself staring at the limp body in his arms. His eyes, still dark, burned and Reid spasmed, body turning to the side as water heaved up from his lungs. Caleb’s eyes returned to normal but continued to stare at the other man, his shoulders shaking as he coughed violently before falling back. For a moment he blinked at the ceiling and seemed only vaguely to notice that anything had changed from where he lay under the water and then his gaze drifted to Caleb’s. His whole body tensed anew and the eldest could almost see everything coming back to him. Panic and anger and even fear in those blue eyes.

“Let go of me, man,” Reid croaked out, pushing at Caleb’s wet shirt to shove himself onto the puddled tile.

“Why would you do that?” Caleb barely managed in a whisper first staring at him in disbelief. He went through the last minute again and again, his mind racing and his heart pounding.

“What? I was swimming!” Reid spat, pushing his arms at the ground to try to stand. Everything shook and he was forced to sit again, to catch his breath, his vision blurring.

“The hell you were!” Caleb shouted at the back turned to him. “What were you thinking?”

Reid hissed, closing his eyes and trying to get his bearings. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I saw you! I saw you down there and I saw you swallow up water like a fucking vacuum!” Caleb grabbed at his friend’s shoulder to try to turn him but Reid jerked away, managing to stand this time.

“You saw wrong. I need to get changed,” he muttered, starting for the locker rooms.

Caleb exhaled slowly and then stood, legs picking up speed despite his wet jeans to run those last steps, slamming the door open before it had closed. He saw Reid jump at the sound, a slight tensing of muscles before the younger man forced himself to relax, to act calm. “What happened?”

Reid stood between bench and locker, pulling open one of those metal doors and grabbing a towel. “What are you talking about now?” He tried to sound amused but he was shaken.

“Damn it, Reid!” Caleb shouted, his voice echoing in that large empty room of metal closets.

The blond tensed again and then sighed, running his hand over his face and using his fingers to rake his hair back. “Just let it go,” he muttered, pulling out another towel and extending his arm to the side, offering it up to Caleb.

The eldest couldn't help but feel like the towel was some sort of surrender, sharp white and hanging from those fingers. With a slow exhale he took those few steps closer but instead of grabbing the towel he grabbed the wrist. He felt the lines of tension shoot through Reid’s arm, spreading to his whole body when Caleb pulled him harshly forward and twisting him around to have his naked back slap against the wall of lockers.

Icy blue eyes widened, staring at him in surprise and barely contained fury. “Let go.”

Caleb released his wrist but both hands moved to his face, touching his cheeks, running his hands down to hold both sides of his neck. Dark eyes bore into those blues. “Why did you try to kill yourself?” He could barely keep it a whisper, his own voice shaking at the words to echo the terror in his heart. His mind couldn’t stop turning. If he hadn’t have come to the gym, if he hadn’t have noticed the silence, if he hadn’t of used--the blond would be a corpse in a body bag.

“I...” Reid licked his lips and Caleb could see the fury melting away. He looked so tired. His mouth opened again but he seemed to be without words.

“Tell me,” Caleb pleaded. “I’ll make it better,” he swore, and he meant it. He would do anything. “Just tell me why.”

That was Caleb. Reid smiled slowly to himself. That was their eldest brother. He would move the stars to take care of the rest of them, there was nothing any of them wouldn’t do for each other. Maybe that was why it had always been so horrible to keep it to himself. It had been the right thing to do at one point, he was sure of it. He had thought about telling them years ago, about letting them save him, but he had decided it was better not to, better to take it himself then let the truth rip them apart. He shook his head slowly and a tear rolled over his cheek, his hand quick to scrub it away and his jaw flexing at though it could hide that weakness. “You can’t.”

He pushed at Caleb’s chest to get some space between them, shaking his head and grabbing for his towel where it had fallen. “I’m sorry, Cay.” He exhaled and tried to smile. “I was tired and it was stupid. I don’t know what I was thinking.” He held out the extra towel to his friend again, this time watching as though he might be able to jerk his arm back in time if Caleb reached for his wrist again.

The eldest took the towel and for a moment just stood there while Reid started to dry off before pulling out his gym bag and clothes. He was getting ready to go like normal. Like nothing had happened and it was so tempting to play along, to believe it. He wanted to pretend that it was some weird mistake, chalk it up to Reid’s unpredictability and maybe sleep deprivation and let it go. But the second in which Reid’s lifeless body lay in his lap continued to taunt him.

They didn’t talk on the way back to Reid’s apartment building and the blond seemed surprised when his friend turned off the engine and got out of the car, following him upstairs. He stayed a few steps behind the blond and watched his back curiously when his stride slowed. He licked his lips to work up words. “Listen, can we not tell Ty about this?” Reid murmured and suddenly Caleb felt like they were fourteen again and Reid had just broken a window. “It’ll just upset him,” he continued and Caleb clench his jaw to keep from replying. He imagined hearing that your best friend tried to kill himself in the pool would upset most men. It had certainly upset him. “I won’t do it again,” he whispered when they reached the third floor hall.

Caleb caught his arm and turned him, wanting to see those blue eyes again. He stared at them for a minute before he spoke. “Swear it.”

“What?” Reid looked startled before he tried to act like it had been a joke.

“Swear that you won’t try to kill yourself again and I won’t tell Tyler,” Caleb said clearly. He hadn’t thought to get his word until the moment arose. The covenant had always been bound by the oaths they gave one another. They were physically incapable of breaking them.

Reid’s face drained of all pretend amusement and Caleb wanted to shout and swear again because that hesitation could only mean he wasn’t sure he wouldn’t. “Then lets go have a conversation with Tyler and Po and call your damn mom too while we’re at it," Caleb hissed, pulling Reid by that arm now toward his apartment door.

With a curse and a twist of his body to break free of that hold, Reid snapped, “Fine! Fuck, it was an accident anyway!” He swore but Caleb just stared at him, waiting. Grinding his teeth he let his eyes wash black. “You have my word. I won’t do it again.”

The door to his apartment opened and Pogue leaned out, raising an eyebrow at the obviously still damp Caleb and then at Reid’s tense back. They looked like they were about to take swings at each other, something they hadn’t done since high school. “Is there a problem?”

Reid’s eyes returned to their blue, still staring at Caleb, waiting to see if he would keep his side of their agreement.

“Nope. Nothing,” Caleb muttered, not looking away from Reid until the blond nodded and turned away, marching past Pogue and into the apartment. Caleb didn’t bother to follow.

* * *

Pogue waited in the hall until he heard another door inside the apartment slam and then he looked at Caleb with a raised questioning eyebrow.

“Watch him,” Caleb said simply. “I’m going to go change our travel plans.” He turned away, hands sliding into his pockets as he headed back for the stairs. “We’re spending Christmas at Tyler’s so tell him to call his mom and let her know.”


	5. Snow

Reid picked up his duffel bag and started toward the door. He locked the door and stood there for another moment staring at it, wishing he could be locked inside rather than out. Pressing his shoulders back he pocketed his keys and started for the stairs.

Outside, he dropped his bag on the step and pulled the pack of cigarettes from his pocket. He looked up and down the street. Tyler wasn’t back with the car after filling up the tank yet. He tapped out a cigarette and put the filter between his lips, stuffing the pack back into the pocket of his jeans. He had two more cartons in the bottom of his bag. He hated christmas. He hated the snow. He hated the decorations and the cheer. It was bullshit and he wasn’t interested. Most of all, he hated what a bitch he sounded like even in his own head.

He pulled the lighter from his jacket pocket. It was brushed brass and old. It had been his fathers and Reid had fixed it twice. He cupped his hand over the flame to bring it to the cigarette, breathing and spitting smoke before flicking his wrist and letting the lid snap shut over the flame. It went out but it was still warm when he put it back in his pocket.

He got two drags, his eyes unfocused in that glaring white of winter, before he heard a car pulling up. His hand reached toward his face, long pale fingers parting to grab the cigarette from his mouth but stopped short when he realized that it wasn’t Tyler’s car. The mustang pulled up and parked before Pogue and Caleb got out. Pogue went to the trunk to pull out their bags.

Reid took another drag and blew out smoke into the already gray sky. “I told you not to come.”

Caleb’s dark eyes stared back at him. “And I told you we were.”

Pogue brushed past his friend on his way to the front of the apartment complex, dumping their bags on top of Reid’s. “Might as well all take Baby Boy’s ride.” Po smiled wide and took the cigarette from his little brother, dropping an arm over the other blond’s shoulder in compensation while he took a long breath of nicotine and tar. “Been a while since we had a road trip.”

Reid continued to scowl at Caleb, his blue eyes staring into those dark browns. “It’s not really much of a road trip. Just a mountain and then a big old house and parents.”

Pogue snorted. “We can go skiing. Ty said he has snowmobiles too and you know the food will be great.” Po grinned wider and turned his head to lean his face into Reid’s hair, his mouth brushing his ear. “I could fuck you in the snow. We’ve done it on the beach, in the woods, in a river. We even did it in a tree once. Bet I could keep you warm in the snow, sweetheart.”

Caleb watched Reid tense, his teeth clicking and jaw flexing. It wasn’t how he usually responded to Pogue’s lewd comments. Normally Pogue and Reid made a lethal dose of lewd. There was no end to it. Which is exactly what led them to rutting in all the wrong places. What started as a joke became a game of chicken that seemed to get both blondes going. But this time, Reid hissed a curse and rolled out from under Po’s arm. “We can’t fuck around up there,” he hissed just as Tyler pulled up, honking the horn. “His parents are there.”

Po laughed but he looked confused and a little hurt at his friend’s reaction. “What? That place is huge! And even if she saw, you know Ty’s mom, she’ll just pretend she didn’t and bake more cookies.”

Reid shook his head, turning away from his brother and toward the car. “Not at his house, man,” he murmured, getting in the front passenger seat and slamming the door. He didn’t even bother to grab his bag.

Pogue stared after him curiously while Tyler rounded the front of the car. “What was that about?” the youngest asked, reaching for Reid’s bag left in the snow after Caleb picked up the ones on top of it.

“Don’t know,” Po answered honestly with a shrug.

Caleb put the bags he carried into the trunk and waited to ask until Tyler came around to do the same. “Do you two not screw around at your mom’s?”

Tyler laughed and shook his head. “Not at all. Not for lack of effort on my part though.” He crammed that last bag in. “I told you, he’s a downer over the holidays.” He laughed again. “Told you you should have stuck with the beach.”

Caleb smiled a little and took a quick step to snatch the keys from the youngest. “I’ll drive.”

Tyler frowned. “It’s my car! You guys never let me drive my own car!”

Pogue laughed and pushed the smaller brunet into the backseat. “To be fair, Baby Boy, we never let you drive any car we’re in--whether or not it’s yours.”

Caleb got in the driver’s seat and didn’t miss the moment of surprise on Reid’s face when he saw him there rather than one of the other two. The grumpy blond sat low in his seat and glared out the window as they pulled away. It was hard not to think about when they had been teens. Reid had been one of those boys--burning hot or frosty cold. He was either full of energy and smiles or glaring at nothing and slouched in his seat. It was going to be a long holiday break.

It took three hours and twenty-seven minutes to get to Tyler’s family’s house. It was through a forest and at the bottom of a mountain. It looked like the sort of place that was always under a layer of snow, even with the lake on its side and a private dock. Everything within eyeshot belonged to Tyler’s family. His father had been good with his money and his power but that hadn’t saved him from a early grave. Tyler barely even remembered him.

The front of the house was decked out with wreathes and tasteful Christmas decorations and as soon as Mrs. Simms, now Mrs. Cramer but the boys had always called her Mrs. Simms even after she remarried, opened the door they were welcomed into the warm glow of a family home. The tree in the living room was at least ten feet high and everywhere they looked it was Christmas. Decorations and wreaths and bowls of peppermint candy.

“Dude,” Pogue muttered, leaning closer to Tyler. “I thought you said it was just going to be us here for the week?”

Tyler laughed and nodded. “It is. She does this even when it’s just me and Reid visiting. I’m pretty sure she’d do it even if we weren’t coming.” He shrugged. “She likes christmas.”

Pogue laughed and nodded. “Alright, then.”

Mrs. Simms had picked out guest rooms for them so that they were all in the same hall on the second floor. Tyler and Reid had the same rooms they always did and Pogue and Caleb were given the other guest rooms across the hall.

“Where’s Gary?” Tyler asked casually.

His mom laughed and told him that Gary was out hunting. It sounded normal coming from her voice. She told them to settle in to their rooms. They all shared a bathroom at the end of that hall and she would call when dinner was ready.

Caleb dumped his bag in his room. It was cozy and he couldn’t help but smile at the little plate of Christmas themed treats. Tyler’s mom really took this seriously. Caleb’s mom wouldn’t even know it was December unless he mentioned it when he called. Pogue’s parents had four daughters and two more sons, saying that their house was crowded around the holidays would be putting it lightly. And Reid... Reid’s dad had died when he was young and his mother had spent the last decade or so traveling the world to hide from her own broken heart.

It was hard for Caleb to imagine how Reid had managed to be so depressed during Christmas if this was where he had spent it every year since he was fourteen.

He shrugged off his coat and headed back out into the hall, leaning into the open door of Tyler’s room to find both him and Pogue already planted on the floor in front of the tv starting up the PS3. “Grab a remote,” Pogue said over his shoulder.

Caleb looked around at Tyler’s room. It was full of mementos from his childhood. Swim trophies and metals and framed pictures--mostly of him and Reid when they were home from school on break. “Where’s Reid?”

Tyler pointed a thumb at the wall behind him.

Caleb nodded and backed into the hall again. He walked those handful of steps to the bedroom door nearest the bathroom and grabbed the knob. He turned but it didn’t open. It was locked. Caleb frowned. Reid was notorious for not locking his door. “What the fuck, man?” he asked through the barrier and after a grumble and the sound of a window closing, the door opened.

The taller man looked down at the blond curiously. The air in the room was cold from the winter outside the window and smelt of cigarette smoke. Caleb frowned. Reid usually only smoked at parties or when he was stressed. “Something wrong?” Caleb asked, his voice as dark as his eyes.

Reid shrugged. “No. Why?”

Caleb stared at him a while longer before inviting him to play video games with the others. It seemed like the blond would decline before finally nodding and joining them. He said almost nothing the whole afternoon. Eventually Tyler’s phone rang and they were summoned downstairs for an elaborate meal. Mrs. Simms was overjoyed to have so many people at her table and Gary, her husband, was charming. He asked a dozen or so questions about their new school and even pretended to be mildly interested in the lives of his step-son’s friends.

Reid continued to be sullen and quiet and only seemed worse by the second day. Caleb watched him all morning over breakfast. He looked exhausted like he hadn’t slept. His eyes were glassy and when he caught his eye he didn’t seem to be behind those blues at all. They went out and road snowmobiles most of the afternoon and when they got back, Reid fell asleep on the couch in the living room.

Tyler hopped on Pogue’s back, complaining about being tired too. The tall blond gave a long smile and offered to put him to bed before climbing the stairs two at a time. Caleb stood in the lobby beside the living room for a while longer, staring at Reid where he slept. He had been a ghost of himself all day, barely said a word and didn’t even seem to understand half of what was going on.

With a frown, the eldest turned away from the living room and went up the stairs. Without a second thought to respect or privacy, he opened Reid’s bedroom door and walked in. It wasn’t the same as Tyler’s. There were no pictures or mementos. It was the same as Caleb’s only somehow less. He went straight for Reid’s bag, knowing that he wouldn’t have bothered to unpack his things into the available dresser or closet. He pulled out a carton of cigarettes, jeans, a bottle of vodka, a few t-shirts and a rumpled plastic bag. He opened the bag and pulled out the plastic bottles inside. Both were prescription meds. He didn’t recognize the name of the patient but he knew what the medication was. With a hiss he turned back toward the hall and marched down stairs again.

Reid was still asleep on the couch. Caleb’s eyes flashed black and in an instant he flushed all of those drugs from Reid’s system. Within seconds the sleeping man’s brow tensed. He stirred, shifting on the couch. He murmured in his sleep and shivered, jerking away from something in his dreams. Caleb sighed and crossed the room. He reached down and took a fistful of his brother’s hoodie, pulling him away from the back of the couch a little. He shook him and then felt all his anger drain away and his heart collide with his stomach when he heard Reid whimper in his sleep. The sound was small and followed by a shaking gasp of air.

Caleb let go of Reid’s hoodie when he heard it, dropping him back against the couch cushions again. Another strangled sound escaped him and Caleb reached down, this time cupping his cheek. “Reid,” he said his name and the blond twitched, his jaw flexing. “Reid,” Caleb demanded and those blue eyes flung open. In that first split second he saw terror in those eyes and then suddenly he was thrown across the room, his back hitting the wall hard enough to have pictures falling to the floor and that damned tree swaying, a few ornaments falling to the hardwood and rolling.

“What the fuck?” Reid demanded, standing upright and shivering. He looked around strangely and Caleb remembered why he had been pissed in the first place.

“Wondering where your buzz went?”

Reid frowned, noticing the pill bottles in the other man’s fist. “Fuck you, man!”

“I thought you were over this shit,” Caleb said, fighting to keep his voice low. Reid hadn’t been taking prescription meds since that time they found him overdosing on halloween when he was sixteen.

The blond flicked a dismissive hand at his friend and shook his head, turning away and starting for the stairs. “It was just a little something. Forget it.”

“A little something?” Caleb snapped, following him. “What are you even doing with these?”

Reid rolled his eyes, taking long steps for his bedroom. He stopped when he reached his door, turning back and raising a finger to jab in Caleb’s direction. He was about to say something when he seemed to choke on the words. Caleb watched all the anger drain from his face and that terror gather in his eyes again. He whirled around and took fast steps to Tyler’s door.

“What?” Caleb demanded.

Reid didn’t answer, grabbing at the doorknob and turning. It was locked and Caleb saw Reid actually shudder--like fear and fury were crawling through his limbs. He took one step back and before Caleb could say anything, he kicked Tyler’s door in.

When it flung open, Caleb could hear what Reid must have already. Tyler’s breathy whimpers and mumbled 'please' against the steady thumping of a headboard. Caleb moved fast to follow Reid those steps into the bedroom. “What are you--” he started but Reid wasn’t listening.

He had made it two steps into the room, staring at the bed, when his eyes flashed black. Tyler was on the bed, his face turned their way and his cheeks pink, his eyes glazed and his mouth open to mewl as the body above his thrust hard. Before either of the men on the bed could take notice of their audience, Reid had hissed and energy had slammed against Pogue--throwing him off of Tyler and the bed and into the couch across the room, breaking the legs out from under it.

Caleb growled. “Reid!” he snapped and before the blond could march forward he grabbed his arm, pulling his back. He felt him tense, his whole body shaking with anger. “What’s wrong with you?” he hissed in his ear.

Pogue grumbled and stood from the couch, looking down at himself and then up. He tossed a quick glance at Tyler, now sitting on his knees on the bed and looking confused but otherwise fine, and then finally looked at Reid. “This is a new sort of cock blocking, sweetheart,” Pogue said but his voice was dangerously low. Reid blinked back at him and for a moment didn’t seem to see him at all and then finally those pits of black turned blue again.

The blond took a step back, unintentionally into Caleb’s chest. He stared at Pogue and shook his head slowly, as though he’d just woken up. “I...” He swallowed and shook his head again before walking out of the room and down the hall. The other three stood still until they heard the sound of Reid’s door slamming shut.


	6. Kiss

Reid had gone to his room after he tossed Pogue from Tyler’s bed and honestly, none of them had expected to see him for a few days, but he had showed up for dinner on time and taken his seat. Caleb had watched curiously as he pushed the food on his plate around and despite being an incredibly picky eater, he finished everything in front of him. It was the same as it had been the first night at dinner. He kept his head down, answered any questions directed toward him, and ate his dinner. He thanked Mrs. Simms at the end of it and lingered with Tyler until they went back upstairs.

And then he vanished into his room again.

The three of them had spoken in low voices about what was wrong with Reid. Tyler insisted he was always depressed over the break but he was usually sedate and grumpy. He said Reid had never thrown any kind of a fit at his house before that morning when he kicked in the door and tossed Pogue across the room. And Pogue said Reid had never used on him before. Not directly. Caleb had a good guess why Reid was so sedate up here usually. His bag was mostly liquor and drugs.

Caleb fell asleep in Tyler’s room while watching a movie. He woke with a start but wasn’t sure what had caused it. The clock beside the bed where Pogue slept read 4:26 and the tv was still glowing though Tyler had fallen asleep long ago, propped up against the foot of the bed with a controller in his hands. Caleb smiled a little. It seemed no matter how old he got he still found himself waking up in the same place he had been since he was a teen.

He stood and stretched, stepping over Tyler on his way to the door. Pogue rolled over, eyes opening for a moment to see that the person moving around was Caleb before closing them again and falling back into his sleep. Quietly, the eldest opened the door and stepped out into the dark hallway. He took just as much care and time in closing the door and was just about to take those steps to his own bedroom when he heard Reid’s door unlocking. He stood stiff and quiet in the hall, waiting for that door to open and Reid to sneak out into the hallway. It did open, but it wasn’t Reid that snuck out.

He stopped breathing. Gary Cramer moved as quietly as possible out of Reid’s room before closing the door and making quick work of walking down the hall, never even noticing Caleb standing there a few feet behind him before he left.

Caleb stood there in the dark for another four minutes, just staring down the hall where Tyler’s stepfather had just been. He tried to think of any reason for him to have been in Reid’s room, any reason but the only true one. He shivered and marched those three long strides to Reid’s door. It wasn’t locked anymore when he threw it open. Reid jumped, sitting in a chair near the window. He looked surprised, his blue eyes wide but glassy again and that bottle of vodka in his hand. His hair was a mess, like it had been pulled, and he was only wearing a pair of sweatpants. He sat still, as though Caleb might not see him if he didn’t move.

The door closed behind him and he shuddered again, looking at the messed up covers of the bed and smelling sex in the room. His dark eyes glared at Reid where he sat. “What happened?”

Reid stared back at him for a long while before taking another drink from the neck of his bottle and shrugging. “What does it look like?”

Caleb hissed and crossed the room. “It looks like you just fucked your best friend’s dad,” he snapped and Reid winced. “I know you’re self-destructive but this?” He tried to keep his voice low, his mind still reeling. “If Tyler finds out-”

“He won’t!” Reid said quickly, standing up and wobbling on his feet. “Just forget about it.”

“Forget about it? You fucked his dad!”

“His step-dad,” Reid corrected sharply. “And so what?”

 _“So what?”_ Caleb repeated in disbelief. “He’s going to be devastated! Why would you do this to him?” He watched Reid wince again, this time turning away from him. He reached out and grabbed at the blond’s shoulder to pull back toward him again. “Why, Reid? What is so awful that you’re trying to fuck up your whole life?”

The blond hissed and swung, his eyes black and his fist slamming into Caleb’s cheek. The eldest staggered back, his own eyes turning black in response as he grumbled low in his chest.

“You don’t know shit!” Reid shouted. “Get out of my room!”

Caleb had his fist balled and shaking at his side. His arm twitched to throw it but in the end he ground his teeth and turned fast, leaving that room before he did something he couldn’t take back. He closed the door and went to his bedroom. He sat in a chair and tried to think this through in a way that made sense. He sat there for hours but he couldn’t understand why Reid would do that to them, to Tyler. What could be driving him so mad that he would ruin them like this?

* * *

Pogue came into his room around eight and jumped when he saw him sitting there in the chair near the window rather than sleeping in his bed. He groaned and cursed, running his fingers through his hair. “You’re looking pretty serious about breakfast,” the blond muttered, taking off his shirt and going to his bag to find a new one.

“Reid is fucking Gary.”

“Gary who?” Pogue asked casually, pulling out a t-shirt and then freezing when he recognized the name. He turned to look at Caleb. “No he isn’t,” he said simply, sounding so certain that for a moment the brunet almost believed him.

Caleb’s jaw twitched and he shook his head. “I saw him leaving Reid’s room. I confronted Reid...”

Pogue looked concerned but shook his head and pulled Caleb’s newly stolen shirt over his head. “He wouldn’t do that to Tyler.”

“He did.”

“He wouldn’t.”

“Po. I saw him,” Caleb hissed.

“Carry Sanders.”

Caleb blinked at his best friend. “What?”

“Carry Sanders,” Pogue repeated. “Reid had a huge crush on her freshman year. I think she was his first real crush.”

Caleb stared at his friend dumbly. “And?”

“Tyler thought she was cute and told Reid. Reid never said a damn word about liking that girl. Tyler spent the next year having a mild crush on her but never getting around to saying anything and Reid never got in the way, never even said he had a thing for her or even got mad at Tyler,” Pogue explained. “I’ve seen Reid take punches for Tyler. I’ve seen him take the blame for pretty much everything Baby Boy has ever done wrong. He couldn’t do anything to hurt Tyler even if he wanted to.” Pogue shrugged, looking more serious than Caleb had ever seen him before. “Tyler is Reid’s brother, his best friend and his first love. He would die long before he let anything hurt him.”

A knock came at the door and jarred them both from their conversation. Tyler poked his head in. “Breakfast,” he said simply around a yawn, leaving the door open before starting down the hall.

Breakfast was a lot like dinner. Lots of polite conversation but Caleb could only watch Reid. He was looking glassy eyed still. He was either drunk or he had more pills in his room than Caleb had found. The brunet couldn’t help but glare when Reid ate his eggs. He hated eggs. He hated them in all forms unless they happened to be an ingredient in something baked.

“So, Gary,” Caleb started before looking away from Reid, the blond shooting surprised blue eyes in his direct just before he did. “It must be a pain for you to have to deal with Reid as well as Ty every holiday season.”

Gary laughed and Caleb tried to smile, staring at him with new eyes. He didn’t like realizing that they shared a similar build though Gary was comfortably in his late forties. He looked good for his age. Was that comforting? “He was quite a trouble maker when they were teens,” he admitted, taking another piece of toast from the plate in the middle of the table. “He’s got a pretty mouth but he only ever said shitty things,” he remarked with a laugh. His wife scolded him playfully for his language.

Caleb felt his veins run cold. He looked at Reid but the blond wouldn’t look back. He was staring at his now empty plate as though it was the most interesting thing in the world.

“They’re good boys though,” Gary continued, smiling at his wife apologetically. “We’re proud of all of your for getting into such a great school.”

Caleb had stopped listening. He felt sick. He stood abruptly and swallowed, eyes suddenly on him. “Excuse me,” he offered before walking away from the table and hurrying upstairs.

* * *

Reid hesitated a moment before muttering, “I’ll check on him.” And then slipping away.

He tried not to look rushed when he walked out of the dining room but he ran up the stairs once he was out of sight. He rushed down the hall and threw open Caleb’s bedroom door. He was still standing, one hand to his face and his dark eyes wide.

“Cay...” Reid started, his stomach in knots. This whole christmas was a nightmare. Worse than anything he could have imagined. Why did he think they could get through this without anyone noticing? Why did he think Caleb would buy that he was screwing around with Tyler’s dad and that was the end of it? He should have sold it better, should have been convincing. Tears welled in his eyes but wouldn’t overflow, held back by will alone. “Caleb,” Reid hissed.

The eldest drew a shaking breath, hand dropping from his face when he straightened and looked at his brother. “How did it start?”

Reid felt like his shoes were stuck to the ground. He couldn’t move, his heart beating in his throat and those dark eyes staring at him, waiting. _He knew._ He could see it in his eyes, in the anger and the misery in those deep browns. How had he let this happen? He had tried so hard to keep it all hidden, to keep that look from crossing any of their faces. “Caleb, it’s not-” he tried to lie one last time, desperate to at least keep it from his brothers.

* * *

“You have a pretty mouth,” Caleb said harshly and watched Reid wince, watched his eyes close and one of those tears finally overflow. His nose wrinkled and his lips curled in a snarl, his fists balled. The blond glared at him when he managed to open his eyes again and all the fury of Reid Garwin was chained in that gaze. “That’s what I said to you when I kissed you. You looked like you look right now, wild and angry, when you punched me.”

Reid shivered. “Caleb-”

“When was the first time Gary said you had a pretty mouth, Reid?”

The blond cringed. “You can’t tell Tyler.”

Caleb cursed and scrubbed a hand over his face. “You don’t want to sleep with Gary,” he started small. This was how truth had to be pried from Reid. Direct and small. Truths he would give without side-stepping because he thought it would let him out of what was coming.

“Of course not,” Reid hissed low.

“But you let him...” He swallowed at the word, cringing away from it.

“Cay-”

“Why?”

“Cay.”

The eldest took a step back to lean against the wall, pressing his skull to it. “Does he do it to Tyler too?”

Reid snarled and took a step closer. “No. Stop talking about it.”

Caleb felt cold even though he was burning with anger. “You do it so he doesn’t do it to Tyler?”

Reid was quiet and that was his answer. Caleb closed his eyes. If Gary had played his cards right he could have threatened Tyler and gotten Reid to do anything he wanted. He couldn’t use against him. They had sworn when they were young that they would never use against each other’s families. They were bound by that word but even without powers, Reid wasn’t easily bullied. He could have told Tyler. He could have told any of them and they would have figured this out. Tyler wasn’t a kid anymore. It’s not like Gary could sneak into his room and... Caleb opened his eyes and felt that cold become ice in his chest. “When did it start?” he asked, his voice low and his eyes finding Reid.

The blond stared back at him. “Caleb, just forget it,” he begged, his voice quiet and strange.

Caleb stood up, away from the wall. “Tyler was twelve when his mom remarried,” he murmured, watching his face carefully for hints. “You started coming here for christmas after your dad passed... You were... fourteen?” Reid’s jaw twitched and Caleb felt his breakfast threaten to rise up on him.

“You can’t tell Tyler,” Reid said stiffly.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Caleb whispered in disbelief.

Reid looked at the floor, his eyes wide and clear, thinking too fast. “We were kids. What the fuck would we have done?”

“We could have called the cops or told our parents, Reid.” He clenched his jaw and shook his head once, turning away. That was done. “We aren’t kids anymore. Why is he still coming to your room at night?”

The blond was still staring at the floor when Caleb turned around to look at him again.

“Tyler’s not a kid anymore. He can’t jump him.” He bit out the words, the idea of someone trying made his skin crawl. “Every christmas, Reid?” he asked, still struggling to wrap his head around this new horror. This was the reason their Reid went to shit every holiday season. This was the reason he picked fights and did drugs when they were kids. It had been going on for more than half a decade and Caleb had never guessed--never even imagined. And this year...this year, Reid had almost drowned himself just to make it stop.

“Tyler can’t find out,” Reid repeated, his voice low. It was a demand as well as a plea and Caleb cringed because he couldn’t defy that tone.

When he closed his eyes he still saw Reid’s body at the bottom of that pool. “It’s over,” Caleb said firmly. “Tyler doesn’t have to find out but that bastard can’t touch you again.”

Reid snorted bitterly and Caleb stared at him in disbelief. It was like he was still a kid under the thumb of an evil adult. “Reid,” Caleb said clearly and waited until the blond looked back at him with those miserable blue eyes. He remembered all the times he had seen a secret in those eyes but resisted the urge to dwell on it. How many times had Reid come close to telling them? How many opportunities had Caleb missed to get the truth and end this? If he had come to this fucking house with them just one christmas ever before now, he would have known. He was sure he would have. “We might not be able to use against him but if we can’t put a stop to this, I’ll kill him with my bare hands and Pogue will help dig a hole to drop him in.”

Those blue eyes softened slowly, a new reality forming in them before he nodded slowly and looked away, toward the door. “What now?”

“Now? Now, we go downstairs and act like everything is fine. We go to the lodge like we planned and we’ll be back in time for dinner,” Caleb said decisively, crossing the room for the door. He brushed past Reid but never quite touched him, trusting the blond to follow him out into the hall.

Reid followed him down the stairs anxiously.

When they reached the bottom of the stairs they could hear the others talking in the room just around the wall. Caleb stopped and before Reid could even look up at him he had grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together. Reid looked down at their joined digits and raised an eyebrow. “What are you doing?”

“You guys still up for the lodge today?” Tyler called when he heard them.

“Of course.” Caleb pulled Reid toward the coats but instead of grabbing them, he turned around to look down at him. Reid frowned suspiciously and pulled at his hand but Caleb didn’t let go.

“You didn’t get much to eat.” Mrs. Simms said as the group was working their way into the hallway. Tyler and Pogue were talking about whether or not the lodge did massages and Gary was sounding very certain that it did.

Caleb didn’t turn to look in the direction of the arriving group. He reached up to touch the side of Reid’s cheek, his palm running down until it cupped the side of his neck.

Reid’s pulse jumped and his eyes widened. “What are you doing?” he half-gasped.

Caleb looked back at him, dark eyes and stern confidence. “Don’t hit me this time,” he said before leaning down. Reid’s eyes were still open wide when Caleb kissed him. He tensed, all of his rushing thoughts jerking to a stop. Those lips parted his and he closed his eyes when Caleb’s tongue stole into his mouth for the first time. He tasted like coffee. Reid squeezed the hand holding his and despite the nerves that had plagued him moments before, he relaxed, his tongue moving against Caleb’s inside his mouth.

Mrs. Simms gasped loudly and dropped something. It was likely christmas themed. Caleb sucked his tongue back into his own mouth and pulled away, looking perfectly surprised and smiling a little. “Sorry,” he muttered almost casually and turned to pull down their coats.

Tyler was standing gape-jawed, the corners of his mouth pulling into a smile at the scene in the middle of his mother’s garland strung hallway.

“Oh, my,” she sputtered, her cheeks turning a sharp pink. “I-I didn’t know...” she started, eyes wide and obviously not sure what it was she didn’t know. “That you two were dating,” she managed, collecting herself to smile. Gary wasn’t smiling but no one seemed to notice.

Tyler laughed then and shook his head. “Oh, mom, they’re-”

“They’ve been together for a while now,” Pogue said with a shrug and moved for the coat rack as well. “Ty, you didn’t tell her?” the taller man shot the brunet a mischievous smirk.

Tyler looked dumbfounded for a moment before laughing again and shrugging. “Guess I forgot.”

Mrs. Simms gave her son a little scolding but had adapted quickly to the new knowledge. “You boys have fun at the lodge. Be back for dinner!” she said happily before picking up the wreath she’d dropped on the floor and pulling Gary along toward the living room.

Reid was still staring at Caleb, his blue eyes almost bulging. “Wh... Why.. What were you...” he sputtered for words.

Caleb looked back at him, holding out his coat. “What?” he asked, Tyler beside them fishing out his keys from his pocket.

Reid frowned.

Tyler pushed at his arm. “You’re blushing.” The brunet laughed before throwing open the front door and leading the way out of the house and toward the car.


	7. Want

Reid had never felt so aware of his brothers as he did on the car ride to the lodge. Caleb drove and somehow Reid had ended up in the front passenger seat beside him. He hadn’t fastened his seat belt and for the first time in his life, Caleb had not even given him an annoyed look about it. Caleb hadn’t looked at him at all. Reid found himself staring at the other man’s knuckles, watching those fingers grip the steering wheel until they turned a new shade of white and he could see the thin blue veins between flesh and bones.

His mind raced. Caleb knew. _Someone_ knew. There had been times when all he had wanted was for someone to know. Now he felt sick. Exposed and ashamed and so damn tired. His lies were crumbling. If Caleb knew than Pogue probably knew. Reid’s eyes found the rear-view mirror and he watched the long-haired blond talking to Tyler. His wide mouth was curled into a casual smile, sly and comfortable as usual. He was almost relieved that nothing had changed there and then Pogue’s eyes slanted to the mirror to look back at him. Nothing in his features changed. Nothing about his smile or the joking words that continued to pour out for the youngest beside him. But in his eyes, Reid saw the questions, the worry, and the anger.

He looked away quickly, turning his cheek away from the mirror and Caleb as well. He stared out the window at the snowy forest rushing past. It was cruel that he could feel like he had ruined his life by letting them find out when all these years he had already felt like his life was ruined by the secret he kept.

They pulled up in front of the lodge and Tyler was the first to hop out of the car. He was excited and happy and completely oblivious. It was enough to make Reid’s stomach twist. No matter what he did now he was betraying his best friend. Telling Tyler would destroy their friendship and his friend’s family but letting him be the only one not to know felt wrong as well.

“You can’t stay in the car all day,” Caleb spoke lowly and Reid tensed, not having realized that he was still in the car with him.

“I don’t feel like sitting in hot tubs,” the blond muttered, watching Pogue land a tightly packed ball of snow against Tyler’s back on their way toward the front doors of the lodge.

“Then drink some cocoa,” the oldest suggested without much interest.

Reid rolled his eyes and got out of the car, feeling much like a teen again, and slammed the door before shoving his hands into his pockets and following his brothers. The lobby was large and there seemed to be a fireplace in every direction. Tyler was already at the counter, getting them lockers and paying for their access to everything this place had to offer that didn’t involve the slopes they tried so hard to push.

“Reid!” Tyler called, turning his shoulders away from the front desk to look at him. “What do you want to do?” his best friend asked, happy but not hopeful that Reid would be in the mood to answer.

The blond shrugged and started toward the door he knew would lead to the changing room. “Whatever. Just sign me up for something easy,” he called back before disappearing from the lobby and into the clean hall of warm colors that led into the locker room.

They didn’t have assigned numbers or anything. Just pick one that wasn’t in use. Inside were towels and slippers and an assortment of crap Reid wouldn’t touch. He unzipped his jacket and peeled it off, stuffing it into the small closet and pulling out the white towel to drop it on the bench. His hat followed his cloves and naked fingers pulled the layers of shirts over his head and into a ball and was pushed into the mess. He turned around to sit down on the bench and realized then that Pogue had followed him in.

The other blond stood just behind him with his back to the other wall of lockers. Reid sat down just as he’d planned and leaned forward to pull at the laces of his boots. “Aren’t you stealthy,” he muttered, not looking at his brother.

Pogue watched him. He’d taken off his own jacket on the way in but was otherwise still clothed. “You used against me the other day,” he said, his voice more thoughtful than accusing but Reid still cringed. “When I was fucking Tyler,” he clarified, as though Reid might have forgotten.

The smaller blond frowned and looked up at his friend, hands moving to the ties of the second boot. “Yeah... Sorry about that,” he muttered before standing to step out of both of his shoes. Bare feet connecting with the cold floor.

Pogue took a step closer and Reid tensed. He frowned down at him. Did Reid think he would hit him? A hundred questions and thoughts ran across Pogue's mind but he decided against them. It wouldn’t help now to say that he should have told them, that they could have helped him.

Pogue was quiet for so long that Reid started to wonder if he would say anything at all, those eyes boring into him were making it impossible to stand still. “What do you want?” the shorter man finally spat out.

“Our first time...” Pogue started. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it. “ _Your_ first time,” he amended. “I almost turned you away because it was October and you were in your mood. You were self-destructive and angry again, the way you always are around the holidays.” There was a new tone to those words, a new understanding.

Reid stared at the shadow in his friend’s eyes. It was hard to breathe, so afraid of where those words were going.

“But you seemed so desperate and I was afraid you would go to someone else if I said no,” Pogue admitted. “You stayed the whole weekend.” He recalled aloud. “We didn’t have sex the first day. You were jumpy and I thought it was nerves.”

“It was,” Reid said quietly but quickly.

“You were afraid,” Pogue thought aloud and Reid saw the pain in his friends eyes.

“Not like that,” Reid corrected quickly.

“You cried,” Pogue pointed out grimly.

Reid frowned and took a step forward this time, pushing his brother back a step. “It fucking hurt and I was so nervous I was lucky I didn’t throw up,” he snapped angrily. “I-”

“Why October?” Pogue interrupted.

Reid’s mouth snapped shut and his lips pressed with a growl.

“Why no blow jobs?” the taller man continued to press.

Reid’s expression darkened. “You know.”

“I want to hear it.”

“Why?”

“I need to know.”

Reid sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face, looking away. “Up until then it had only been blow jobs but the things he said...” he muttered so lowly that he wasn’t even sure Pogue would hear him. “I didn’t want him to be my first.” He looked up through his lashes at Pogue. “I wanted you,” he admitted.

Pogue stared back at him. It was what he wanted to hear and yet he could not have prepared himself for just how relieved he was to hear it. He reached out slowly to curl his fingers around the back of Reid’s neck, worried his lover and friend might cringe away. He didn’t. The shadow in Reid’s eyes had been there almost their entire relationship. Since they were too young. It was a horrible realization that knowing didn’t change anything. Nothing had happened to Reid this year that had not happened in the years before. Nothing was new. The only thing that had changed was the fact that they knew and that it wouldn’t happen again. The future would change and no matter how it grated, that was all they could do.

They heard Tyler’s voice when he and Caleb walked into the locker room, isles of closets away. Pogue still stared at Reid.

“Are you guys in here?” Tyler shouted, his voice echoing slightly.

"Over here,” Pogue called and when their brother’s rounded the corner he let his hand fall away from Reid’s neck.

“Are we interrupting something?” Tyler laughed, throwing his jacket onto the bench beside Reid.

Pogue smiled. “You’re always interrupting something,” he assured before he turned to the opposite wall and started stripping down. “So what’s the plan?”

Tyler hopped on one foot while pulling his shoe off the other. He managed to make it look casual rather than awkward or childish. Reid almost smiled. “Well, you and I are going to the hot tubs and if those aren’t empty, we’ll have a go at the sauna.”

“Empty?” Pogue smirked and looked back at his friend, raising an eyebrow. “Looking for privacy?”

Tyler’s cheeks pinked a little and he shrugged newly naked shoulders.

“Am I supposed to be filming your sauna sex?” Reid asked blandly, pushing down his jeans and his underwear in the same motion and tossing them into the well stuffed locker. They had never been shy with each other, even before they’d been lovers. Though, admittedly, Reid peeked when Caleb stripped down most of the time. Not today though. Today, he stared into his locker, pushing things around and looking for the towel he’d already taken out.

He couldn’t help but think of Caleb’s mouth colliding with his less than a half hour ago. Like everything with Caleb, it had been intense and it took all the self control he had not to reach up and touch his mouth, wondering if his lips were swollen. They still tingled from that kiss. He could still taste Caleb’s tongue in his mouth.

“Yo!” Tyler shouted and laughed. Reid blinked and turned his head to look at his friend. It seemed he had been talking and Reid hadn’t heard any of it. He jumped when he felt a hand nudging his arm and turned to look up at Caleb, those dark brown eyes staring back at him- unreadable. The taller man was holding out his towel, waiting. Reid scoffed and grabbed it from him, wrapping it around his waist and closing his locker door. Caleb and the others were already ready to go, towels hanging on their hips and lockers closed up.

Tyler just laughed and shook his head, following Pogue toward the doors that lead to the sauna. “Nevermind. See you in a couple hours!” he shouted before disappearing. Reid watched him go.

“Are you ready?” Caleb asked and Reid look up at him curiously.

“For what?” He sounded defensive. Really, he was alarmed to find himself alone with Caleb again. “Aren’t you going with them?”

The brunet rolled his eyes and started in the other direction. “You really weren’t listening were you?” Caleb muttered.

Reid followed him though with every step he wondered if he shouldn’t. He stared at the muscles in Caleb’s back, his shoulders, his waist. It was stupid to think that he’d had a crush on this man his whole life. Stupid, because they were friends and brothers and even without the acts they had always been more.

“What’s your plan?” Reid heard himself asking the thing he didn’t really want to talk about.

Caleb looked back at him, surprised and then shrugged one of those shoulders. “You don’t want Ty to know and I said I wouldn't tell him. I guess killing his step-dad might make him suspicious.”

Reid struggled to breathe but managed to follow the brunet through the door and into a small waiting room with soft lights and instrumental music.

“I told you, I’ll let it go as long as you want it that way,” Caleb said. His tone was mild but Reid heard the words that went unsaid. It was an offer to make Gary pay if and when Reid ever changed his mind about how he wanted to handle this. “But it can’t happen again,” the brunet clarified. He stopped beside a door to look back at Reid, tilting his head to the side. “Do you want to see a therapist or something like that?” he asked as though the thought had just occurred to him.

Reid snorted. “Fuck you,” he muttered and then pushed pasted Caleb and into the room that seemed to be their destination. He stopped a few steps in and frowned. A padded table, more low lighting, candles and a side stand with scented oils. “You’re shitting me! Baby Boy knows I hate the massages here. It’s all hot rocks and elbows.”

Caleb laughed. “Stop bitching and lay down.”

Reid realized then that there was only one massage table in this room and no masseur. He turned to look at Caleb skeptically. “Why?” he demanded anxiously.

Caleb lifted an eyebrow again, this time a little surprised but smirked. “Are you afraid?” he asked it out of curiosity rather than worry and Reid was grateful.

He snorted irritable and laid face down on the table. “No. But if you’re going to get handsy with me than this massage better have a happy ending.” He smirked at his own cleverness but felt his skin tighten with nerves when he couldn’t see Caleb anymore.

“That’ll cost extra,” Caleb said casually, his fingers running a line up Reid’s spine before starting on the back of his shoulders.

Reid shivered and then groaned, his eyes closing. “Worth it,” he muttered, hands moving down his shoulder blades and along his ribs. “Fuck.. where did you learn that?” the blond asked, his words soon slurring a little.

Caleb smiled because his friend couldn’t see. “Pogue used to get muscle aches in high school. This used to stop his bitching.” He smiled and rolled his thumbs into the base of Reid’s spine, just over the cleft of his ass and the top of his towel. “It also made him easy to top.”

Reid cracked an eyelid and his lips curled into a smirk. “You think this’ll make me easy to top?”

Caleb laughed a little, a breathy sound. “The thought never crossed my mind.”

Reid closed his eyes again, his lids heavy and his body humming. For the first time in months he felt calm. Caleb knew his secrets and his life wasn’t ruined. Things were still moving forward. He actually felt good. He sighed heavily and lifted his hips without thinking when his friend pulled at his towel. He winced a little when he dropped his hips back down, the leather padding of the table cold against his erection. But he didn’t care, not with those hands digging fingers into his hips and thighs.

“Roll over,” he heard Caleb say, voice heavy and dark.

Reid moaned and his body shifted to flip onto his back. Eyelids pried open again to look up at the other man, those dark eyes staring back at him. Reid opened his mouth, to say something witty or maybe to ask what now, but all attempts at words morphed into a guttural moan when Caleb wrapped a warm hand around Reid’s cock. His eyes rolled shut when Caleb started stroking him. His whole body was heavy, tired and relaxed, but his breath came in thick gasps. His hips lifted as best they could to thrust into the hand pumping his sex. “Cay...” he managed to moan the name.

“Can I put it in my mouth?” Caleb asked curiously. It sounded strange, for that voice so thick with lust to ask. Just from what Reid had heard from Tyler about Caleb in the bedroom, he wasn’t really one to ask.

Reid shivered through the fog of his pleasure. “Hnn... Y-You don’t... You don’t have to... do that..” he panted, body starting to shake already. His breath caught in his throat and his blue eyes opened again when a hot tongue stroked down his the head of his cock just before lips wrapped around it. He almost choked on his own saliva when he looked down at Caleb’s head bobbing over his hips, his sex wrapped in the heat of that mouth and that tongue rolling against his flesh.

Within seconds he hissed a warning and his head dropped back, pressing into the padding while his hips rose, cum bursting from inside of him. He stared at the ceiling, his vision blurring as he felt Caleb swallowing around him, sucking the last of his lust from his cock before letting go of him.

He said something, he knew he had, but he forgot what it was almost as soon as the words escaped him. When he woke more than an hour later on that same table with a towel over his waist, he still wouldn’t be able to remember what it had been that he said. But he’d remember the smirk on Caleb’s swollen mouth.


	8. Need

Reid was still rubbing one towel into his hair when he walked back into his bedroom from the bathroom just down the hall. His pajama pants clung to his thighs where the fabric found left behind water. His naked heel kicked the door shut behind him. Dinner had been awkward at best. It was a nightmare, really, watching Tyler and his mom talk away the evening over roast and mashed potatoes while Caleb and Pogue both knew his secret.

Pogue was alarmingly good at pretending he didn’t know anything. Reid had stared in some disbelief when the other blond engaged Gary in a conversation about cars before offering to get him another beer from the kitchen when he went. Reid might have thought his friend had actually forgotten that ugly secret if it weren’t for the expertly casual way he managed to be with Tyler just about every minute of the day. Reid realized that Po was sheltering the youngest, guarding him.

Reid also realized that Caleb did not have the same tact as Pogue. He didn’t pretend so much as he just didn’t say. More than once he saw the brunet glaring across the table at Gary--actually glaring. It was enough to make every meal feel like a time bomb. It should have put Reid on edge but for some reason it was a relief. Someone else was choking on the anger that had been killing him for years and even with all those fragile lies overhead, Reid could finally breathe.

He still had the towel over his head and was on the far side of his room when he heard his door open. Reid froze and he felt his skin tighten. He hadn’t locked the door. Gary had told him never to lock the door at night and had half drowned him that time when he did, so he just never really thought to do it anymore. His jaw flexed and he pulled the towel off his head and shoulders, dropping it on the floor. The door at his back closed and he turned around, teeth clenched. What was he supposed to say? How was this not going to be a scene that would get Tyler’s attention? Did he really think he could just tell Gary to get lost? Was he so naive that he believed he would just leave?

Reid exhaled when he saw Caleb standing there. The brunet looked back at him with those endlessly dark eyes. A thousand thoughts in those eyes and yet none of them were available for Reid to see. “Expecting someone else?” Caleb asked darkly.

Reid frowned and took a step closer to his bed but it also brought him closer to Caleb who stood on the other side of it. “You should go.”

When Caleb frowned, Reid realized that he hadn’t been already. “We had a deal.” His voice was quieter, almost a growl.

“I know. I’ll take care of it.”

Caleb scoffed then, actually scoffed. “The hell you will,” he muttered and to Reid’s surprise, he started to undress. He took his shirt off and tossed it onto a chair. “When does he show up?”

Reid paled. He didn’t want to talk about the details. It was embarrassing and it was infuriating and he’d rather pretend it didn’t happen at all.

“Reid.” Caleb said his name the way he usually did when he was annoyed.

The blond glanced sideways at the clock on the desk before taking a breath and letting it out. “Soon. You should go,” he repeated.

Caleb’s jaw twitched but whatever he thought, he didn’t say. Instead, he started working the buckle of his pants open.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Reid demanded.

Caleb looked up at him then, pants open and hanging on his hips. Reid could see where those lines of muscles ended and the thin trail of hair started in a downward path. Brown eyes looked at him through lashes, darker for the slightness of light in his room. “I’m solving your problem,” his brother whispered dangerously before giving his pants a last shove to have them dropping to his ankles. He stepped out of them, completely naked.

Reid struggled to remember his own anger when he watched Caleb walk toward him, closing that precious space between them. “I don’t need you to solve it.”

“The fuck you don’t,” Caleb replied sharply, stopping to stand right in front of him, head tipped to the side as though it could make up for their difference in height. Those dark eyes continued to bore into him. “It’s been your problem long enough,” he finally whispered and Reid shivered when he felt a warm hand on his side, moving down until long fingers pushed at the band of his sleeping pants. “Let us take care of it now,” Caleb offered, his face moving closer, mouth closer. “Let me take care of it,” he whispered, his breath against Reid’s mouth.

Reid shook out a breath when that hand moved to have his pants dropping down his legs. He hated the knots in his stomach. He had done just about every debauched act imaginable with more people than he could remember, so why did his muscles ache and his stomach twist with nerves when it was Caleb? Something in the way those eyes looked at him always made him feel raw, like his skin was burning and he would rather be ash than find water.

He was hard before Caleb even pressed their hips together, his breath hitching in the back of his throat to become a groan. The brunet smiled, mouth still so close that he could almost taste those lips. “Tell me to leave again,” the eldest whispered, grin daring him. “Tell me you don’t want me.” Fingers ghosted over his sides and down his hips. “Tell me you don’t want me to push you onto that bed and fuck you like you’ve never been fucked before.”

Reid’s lips curled away from his teeth to snarl just before his body did the pushing, shoving Caleb back and onto the bed and tackling him when he did. He straddled his brother, finally burying his fingers in the back of that brown hair like he’d always wanted to, fisting his hands in that hair and smashing his mouth against the other’s. The kiss was deep, growling and violent. Reid’s whole body shook from the pleasure of finally letting go, biting that lower lip until he tasted red and heard that moaning growl in the other man’s chest before they rolled. Caleb turned them and brought them down, to press Reid beneath him, his hips grinding the other’s ass down against the mattress.

Reid’s eyes opened to look up at the ceiling, his mouth working out sounds that might have been intended as words while Caleb moved swollen lips and tongue along his neck. Reid arched beneath him, rubbing up as though to test his brother’s weight. He felt that mouth smile against his neck but before he could ask, he felt soft warm fingers sliding inside of him, stretching his ass even as it was pressed against the bed. He groaned in pleasure when those fingers rubbed inside of him but looked at Caleb in surprise, knowing that both his hands were already on his body. The eldest smiled at him, eyes washed in black and Reid couldn’t stifle the moan in his throat, feeling those phantom fingers thrusting in and out of him while Caleb continued to grind their erect cocks together between their bodies.

“Y-You’re...using,” Reid panted, not even sure himself if it was intended as a question of surprise or a jab with a little ‘see, using is fun’ attached to the end of it.

Caleb just grinned back at him. “What are you going to do about it?”

The blond moaned and bucked beneath him, this time his eyes washed black and his body had enough force to turn them over and have himself sitting on top of the brunet. He had to pause to moan when those phantom fingers seemed to grow inside of him, rubbing and thrusting. Caleb tried to sit up and fingers with too much magic behind them shoved him back down on the mattress. Fire shimmered over the blacks of his eyes and Caleb moaned, surges of warm pleasure pulsing out through Reid’s hand to roll through the other man’s chest and out to his arms and legs.

Caleb’s moans hitched, his eyes opening with a deep groan rising in his chest when he felt a hand wrap around his cock, stroking it a few times before those blue eyes met his. The glint of frantic desire he saw there made him remove the magic he’d used to work Reid’s ass, leaving it empty in the hopes that he’d find other means of filling it. He held his breath when he watched the other man lift his body onto his knees. The hand holding Caleb’s cock moved it until the head was pressing against that spot. It took everything he had not to push his hips up and shove himself inside, to wait and watch with exhaling moans as the blond sank himself slowly down.

Caleb was taking slow, shaking breaths by the time Reid was seated completely on top of him. Those cold blue eyes stared down at him, smile in the corner of his lips and for an instant Caleb thought the blond would never move. Those hips rolled, rubbing, teasing and then, when Caleb couldn’t take it anymore, they lifted as high as they could without losing him and then crashed back down, making them both shout. His fingers pressed into the muscles of Reid’s thighs, the blond bouncing on top of him soon.

When he was close, Caleb grabbed Reid’s swollen cock and started stroking it, flicking his thumb over the head. Reid moaned loudly, he did everything loudly, and started bouncing faster and pushing deeper. Caleb clenched his teeth to hold off, watching through half-lidded eyes when the blond came, spilling cum over his stomach and chest and screaming at the ceiling. Still holding that now pulsing cock in his hand he let his eyes close and his lust take him, his hips straining up into Reid when he came.

* * *

Tyler rolled to his feet, dropping the controller on the floor. “Can they get louder?” He laughed at the sound of Reid’s shout of pleasure in the other room. He walked around the bed to the door, opening it and stepping out into the hallway. “I’m gonna take a leak.” He had died anyway, it would take a minute to revive while Po continued the zombie slaughter without him.

He had only taken one step out into the hall when he stopped, surprised to see Gary there, carefully closing the door to Reid’s room. Had it been open? He watched his step-father’s clenched jaw flex. He looked angry. He didn’t leave right away. He stood there, staring at the door. Tyler hadn’t really thought about whether or not Gary would have a problem with Caleb and Reid. Was it because he’d walked in on it? Why was he even in this part of the house?

Tyler found himself stuck there, staring at his step-dad’s face twisted with anger. He had never seen it like that before. And then Gary realized he was there. His face changed, surprised and then... nothing. Like a blanket had fallen over his features. He turned away and started toward the stairs. Tyler found himself following and caught up at the steps around the corner. “Gar-”

“I think Caleb and Pogue should leave,” he said before Tyler could even get out his name, standing at the top of the stairs.

Tyler blinked at him. “What?”

“Caleb is obviously a bad influence on Reid.”

Tyler would have laughed if the man weren’t serious. “They’re dating,” he said flatly. It wasn’t really the truth, no more than saying that any of them were dating each other, but he didn’t like the look in Gary’s eye or the tone of his words. Something about all of it was making him sick. “They’re adults and they have sex.”

Gary scrubbed a hand over his face and shook his head. “I always knew Reid was a slut but in my house-”

“My house,” Tyler corrected, his voice louder and sharper than even he had ever heard it. Everything belonged to him now that he was an adult. It was left to him by his father long before Gary ever showed up. He took a breath and sighed, shaking his head. It wasn’t in his nature to be cruel. “If it’s a problem we can leave.”

“No,” Gary exhaled and shook his head, starting down stairs again. “No. I was just surprised.”

“Gary,” Tyler called and his step-father stopped at the bottom of the stairs. “If you call him a slut again, I won’t be coming back for holidays and you can explain that to mom.” He watched Gary’s back stiffen before he walked away.

He stood there and stared at the dark left behind for a while longer before he heard Pogue calling him. He turned back and started down the hallway, planning to make a detour at the bathroom when he saw Reid’s door open and the blond sneak out with an aim for the bathroom himself. Tyler smiled and picked up his speed into a sudden run down the hall, surprising his sex-sweaty best friend in time to half-tackle him into the bathroom.

Reid was between a laugh and a curse when Tyler kissed him, opening his mouth with the parting of his lips to press his tongue in, tasting two different familiarities blended together. Reid smiled against the kiss and his shoulders dropped, relenting to his slightly younger friend. When he pulled back, still smiling, Reid raised an eyebrow. “What?”

Tyler shrugged and let go of Reid, walking past him to the toilet and lifting the seat. “Just like you.”

Reid leaned against the sink and waited. “Don’t be a pansy,” he muttered with a smile.

“Then stop blushing.”

Reid frowned but it was difficult to make it look sincere.


	9. Bleed

His eyes opened.

He was propped against the side of a boat, covered with tarp and snow. He looked down at himself and realized that he too was soon to be covered in snow. His limbs felt heavy and when he tried to move it was like they were filled with led. His chest hurt. His teeth ground when a cry of pain threatened to come up from his throat, making his whole body shake and his vision blur. He looked down at his chest, his labored breath forming in the air to blur his vision.

There was red everywhere. Matting down the fabric of his shirt into a wet sticky mess and covering his hands. Reid’s breath came quicker, panicked and confused. He looked around at the snow, at the forest and the edge of the frozen lake. His hand groped at his chest, fingers shaking with fear of finding the wound. But soon they trembled because he couldn’t find it.

His memory was blurry, sketchy. They had lunch and then they were in the living room. No. Tyler and Pogue went out to go snow boarding. Reid had been in the living room with Caleb. They were watching tv and Tyler’s mom... Tyler’s mom brought them snacks the way she always did. Juice, like they were little kids but she hadn’t really looked at them, she hadn’t even said much. And then...

Reid’s body curled forward and to the side when he vomited onto the snow.

A man laughed. He knew that laugh but he didn’t look up, tears burning his eyes and blood smearing his cheek. “You killed him,” Reid whispered in disbelief.

Gary stood over him. “No, kid, _you_ did.”

Reid ground his teeth and choked on a scream. He couldn’t move his arms or legs. He couldn’t move. Gary grabbed him by his boots and started dragging him onto the frozen lake. “Y-You poisoned us,” Reid panted, shaking in the cold and the misery. He remembered Caleb’s body on the floor of the living room. His eyes were still open, dark brown as always but without all of the thoughts behind them, without Caleb behind them. There had been so much blood.

“It won’t show up on a tox screen,” Gary explained casually and Reid’s face scrunched in confusion. What did that matter?

“You killed him because he was going to dump you,” Gary explained, the ice made creaking sounds beneath them. “And then you came out here and killed yourself. It’ll be very tragic. I don’t know how Tyler will ever recover.”

Reid shook, a cold tear tracking down his temple and into his hair. “They won’t believe it.”

“Of course they will. You’re a fuck up.”

Reid stared up at the gray sky, his skin felt so cold. “I would never hurt one of them and I wouldn’t kill myself.” He smiled a little, miserable as the gesture was. “I gave my word.”

“What is your word worth?”

Those blue eyes looked up at him, bitter and angry. “My word is the only thing that has kept me from gutting you all these years.”

Gary stopped and dropped Reid’s legs. The ice beneath his heels cracked when they fell. That was when Reid saw the bloody bat in Gary’s other hand. Not Reid’s blood. Subconsciously he groped at his shirt, clutching at the cold blood that was soaked into it. “You shouldn’t have done this to them, Reid,” Gary said, taking a breath and a moment to look down at the youth. “Did you really think I’d let you leave?”

Reid shivered and looked at the sky again, a refusal to look at Gary.

The bat raised and came down against the ice beside him. It vibrated the frozen surface beneath him and he heard the cracks spreading. His breath came faster when the bat continued to break up the ice until it finally shifted and sunk. Reid inhaled sharply when his legs went into the water, the ice rocking beneath him and the lake lashed at the moving surface as though it wanted to see the sky too. Another crack of the bat and the ice beneath his back tipped and gave way, the dark water swallowed him and the sky vanished.

* * *

-One hour earlier-

Reid flipped through channels, pausing every so often.

Caleb was sitting in the corner of the couch, one arm stretched along the back and Reid’s body leaned into the side of his chest. It was one of those casual affections that if Caleb pointed out in anyway, Reid would move but so long as he didn’t say anything, Reid stayed there, practically snuggling.

It was funny enough that Caleb hadn’t said a single thing through the rotation of more than three hundred channels but halfway through the second roll he sighed. “Pick something,” he ordered.

Reid scoffed. “Fuck you, I have the remote,” the blond countered simply and continued flipping. “When do Tyler and Pogue get back?”

“Soon.” Caleb look down at the blond head using his chest as a pillow. “You hungry?”

Reid shrugged against Caleb’s ribs and laughed at a pair of women on a reality television show fighting. Really, it was more pulling and screaming than actual fighting, but even that didn’t keep his attention long and soon they were watching an infomercial and then a cartoon that most definitely was not meant for children. “We’ll eat when they get back. They can’t be that far off if it smells like Ty’s mom is already done with dinner in there.”

Caleb nodded even if the other wasn’t able to see. They would head home tomorrow. It left Caleb with mixed feelings. On one hand, he could finally do Reid in every room of his house, on the other, he knew that they would still have to deal with Gary at some point. Were they really going to keep this from Tyler forever? Go to holidays at his mom’s house every year and just use this buddy system to avoid his step-dad?

It was hard for Caleb not to think about Reid’s teen years sometimes. Not to think about all of the hints and the moments that should have told him something was wrong, something more than just his attitude problems. He closed his eyes. Reid continued to flip through the channels.

He didn’t open then again until he heard Mrs. Simms walking into the room. “Snacks.” She muttered and put the tray of juice and cookies on the living room table. Caleb looked up at her but she didn’t really look back. “Thank you.” He said and her mouth pressed as though it struggled to smile before leaving the room again. He wondered if it was making her uncomfortable, the way he and Reid were sitting on the couch together, but he wasn’t willing to push Reid away just to make her more comfortable.

With a mumbled thank you of his own, Reid sat upright and grabbed one of the glasses. It looked fresh squeezed. Not surprising considering the nature of Mrs. Simms. Reid took a long drink and Caleb smiled a little, watching his throat move as he did. The dark haired man reached out and Reid put the now half emptied glass into his hand before resuming his hunt for the perfect show.

“What exactly are you looking for?” Caleb finally asked, finishing the glass.

“Dunno., Reid said simply. “I’ll know when I find it.”

“This is why you don’t have tv at your place isn’t it?”

Reid smiled but continued to stare at the screen. “Baby Boy says I get even less productive. I don’t know what the fuck he’s talking about, I’ve never been productive.”

Caleb nodded. “Good point.”

Reid rolled through another dozen channels before he blinked, his vision swaying.

“What’s wrong?” He heard Caleb ask.

He moved his thumb to press the button, to change the channel, but nothing happened. He looked down and realized that he’d dropped the remote. “I don’t know,” he exhaled. His limbs were tingling and his head felt heavy.

Caleb frowned and started to reach for him when he saw someone move near the opening of the living room. Gary stepped in, his boots seemed heavy on the carpet and when Caleb saw the bat he was holding he stood from the couch. He took a step forward before his knees buckled beneath him, his breath shuddering in when his sight wavered. His limbs felt heavy and weak. His lips curled with a snarl and his eyes washed black but nothing happened. They couldn’t use against a family member. It was a pact they’d made as children that held strong even now. “Son of a-” Gary swung the bat and it collided with Caleb’s shoulder. There was a cracking sound that had Reid’s eyes widening just in time to watch his brother fall forward onto his hands and knees.

Reid exhaled a curse when he saw that bat rise again and pushed himself forward, reaching for Gary’s arm. With a snarl the older man shoved Reid off and onto the floor. His arms hung heavy and his head throbbed.

The bat came down against Caleb’s back the second time and a kick to his ribs sent him rolling on the carpet, spitting up blood. Gary was shouting, yelling in his anger when he continued to beat that bat down against the barely conscious other man. Reid was struggling to breathe through the terror and the panic, clawing at the floor to drag himself toward the sound of breaking bones and wet wheezing breath.

“Cay! Cay!” he shouted, grabbing at his brother’s leg.

Gary stopped and took a step back, struggling to even out his own breathing and shaking from the release of his anger.

Reid pulled himself to Caleb, grabbing at him, pulling. There was blood everywhere and it seemed that every time he touched him, he felt misshapen bones beneath skin. His breath hitched in his throat when he stared at that face, cheek busted open and eyes staring at nothing. He couldn’t breathe looking at those eyes, looking at that nothing where everything had once been. He heard someone screaming. It sounded like howling and the walls started shaking. Pictures fells down and windows cracked before blowing out of their frames.

Reid never really realized that he was the one shouting, that his eyes were black and that it was his power that started splitting the walls of that living room.

Gary swung the bat to hit the blond in the back of the head and the room finally settled. His wife stood in the hallway, as far from the living room as she could be while still being able to look in. She was clutching at a dish towel and staring with wide eyes. They didn’t exchange words when Gary start dragging Reid out of the room, the front door left open in his wake.

She sank down the door to sit in the hallway, waiting.

* * *

It was only another fifteen minutes before the truck pulled up in the driveway but it had felt like hours. “Mom?” Tyler called with a note of curiosity in his voice when he found the front door open. That surprise would become terror when he saw the living room. She closed her eyes and stood up.

Pogue dropped the keys on the hardwood of the hallway when he saw Caleb’s body in the living room. Tyler laughed at his clumsiness and came closer just in time to have that sound choke in his throat.

“Cay?” Po called loudly when he rushed into the room, dropping to his knees in blood soggy carpet without a second thought. His hands hovered over his best friend, not sure where to put them. “Cay,” he said firmly but there was no answer. His eyes washed black and his body stilled.

Tyler stood in the hallway, staring at the scene, waiting for some sign that this was okay. “W-Where’s Reid?” he asked no one in particular, eyes still soaking in the red and the broken windows and the cracks in the walls.

“He...He left,” his mother said when she took a few steps closer and Tyler turned his head to look at her, confused. She looked alright, clean and squeezing wrinkles into a christmas themed towel.

“What?”

“He...Reid. Reid killed Caleb and then ran off,” she mumbled.

Tyler’s whole body turned to look at her then. _Killed Caleb._ The words stuck to his thoughts, clinging and making his stomach twist. “What?”

“They were arguing,” she stammered out, voice rising but her eyes never met his. “I-I don’t know what about. They were arguing and then...”

“No.” Tyler exhaled, watching her in shock. “Why would you say that?”

“I saw it,” she insisted, almost frantic now. “He killed Caleb and then ran off.”

Tyler took a step closer and she staggered back, bumping into a wall. He stopped cold and stared at her in disbelief. She was his mother and yet he couldn’t recognize her. “What did you do?”

“What?” She looked up at him then, her eyes large and rimmed red from crying. “No! It wasn’t me! It was Reid! He was a slut and he-”

“What?” Tyler’s voice raised, his eyes widening and his heart pounding. _Was_. She said _was_. “What did you do to him?”

“Nothing!” she started crying. “I’m so sorry about Caleb. I’m so sorry, Tyler. But Reid-” She swallowed hard, shaking her head. “He deserves it for what he did to us.”

Caleb took a gasping breath that turned quickly into a howl of pain, his bones resetting and his body shaking as it stirred from death. Pogue sagged to the side, steadying himself with one hand in the wake of his own Using. Caleb coughed and no matter how pained or wet the sounds were, they were music to his brothers ears.

But Tyler saw the flare of panic in his mother’s eyes and knew it wasn’t a relief to her. “What are you talking about?” he demanded, tears in his eyes. He couldn’t imagine her having beaten Caleb to death, which only left one other person. “Where is Gary?” Tyler demanded.

Her eyes widened, staring back at him. “Reid deserves it,” she hissed, clutching that towel to her chest. “You don’t know Tyler!” She cried and this time he grabbed her arms to pull her closer.

“Tell me,” he demanded, shouting through his clenched teeth.

“He seduced him!” she cried.

“What?” Tyler’s face scrunched in confusion. “Who? Caleb?”

She shook her head madly. “Gary! That slut has been sleeping with your step-father for years!” She wailed.

Tyler stared at her for another heartbeat before letting her go. She slumped to the floor but he wasn’t looking anymore.

“He’s been sneaking around with him since you were a boy.”

Tyler took a step back and then another. It was like he’d been punched in the chest.

“Baby boy...” Caleb wheezed from the floor. Pogue stood up and asked something but Tyler wasn’t listening, couldn’t.

“Where is he?” Tyler heard himself ask.

After some sniffles and sobs she whispered, “The lake.”

He heard Pogue ask something else but he couldn’t register it. He didn’t care. He just turned away from his mother and that house and started running. The white stretch of valley along the side of the forest lay ahead of him with piles of snow. His eyes flashed black and he cut across the white like a flicker of a shadow. When he reached the lake he had to stop to look around, desperate to see them.

He only saw one man on the ice and it wasn’t the one he wanted to see there. He felt Pogue catching up to him just as he saw Gary raise the bat in his hands and swing it down. He looked on in a moment of confusion when the man assaulted the ice, and then he saw the shape of a body there just before it slipped into the water and disappeared.

In a flash of black they were there, on the lake. Pogue was the first to reach the broken ice and without hesitation, he jumped in and disappeared as well. Tyler felt alone, standing there, staring at the water and wondering if they would come back up.

“Tyler...” Gary murmured, his voice shaking.

The surface of the water broke and his heart clenched in his chest. He saw Pogue first and then with a pull of his body, the larger man pulled up the smaller. Tyler dropped to his knees on the edge and grabbed Reid from him, dragging him up onto the ice. Tyler’s eyes flashed black and Reid started coughing up water. His clothes dried and the poison burned out of his veins. Tyler hung onto him until he saw his eyes open, confused and tired blues staring up at him. “Wh-”

“You’re an idiot!” Tyler yelled, surprising even himself. His hands fisted in the front of his brother’s shirt, holding his chest up from the ice.

Reid didn’t seem to notice the volume of his brother’s voice or the shaking of his own body. “Cay...” he muttered, breathing the name like pain itself.

Tyler hissed through his teeth. “He’s fine!” he shouted and almost losing his own focus when he saw the surprise and hope in Reid’s pale face. He couldn’t let it be done at that. “How long, Reid?”

Reid blinked and then his eyes widened, that miserable shadow veiling them again the way it had for so many years. “You know.” He exhaled in defeat.

Tears stung at Tyler's eyes and his fingers jerked at the front of Reid’s shirt, forcing him to sit up higher. “How fucking long, Reid?”

Pogue was dry when he knelt next to them, his hand grabbing at Tyler’s wrist. “Baby boy... Let him go,” he said softly.

Tyler sucked air between his teeth, his eyes going black and a small gust of power shoving Pogue back enough to have him landing on his ass just out of reach. He leaned forward, his face closer to Reid’s and his eyes unyielding, searching for the truth in those lying blues. “When?”

Reid swallowed, a part of him wishing he was still in the water. “A long time. It started after my dad passed..” He saw Tyler wince and felt panic rise in his chest. “Ty, it’s not what you think.”

Tyler closed his eyes. They hadn’t been very old when Reid’s dad died. His stomach twisted when everything seemed to make sense. The holidays. He brought Reid with him every year. Every year.

Tyler let him go then and the action seemed to scare the blond. Reid grabbed at his brother, shaking his head desperately. “You have to listen to me, I didn’t...I didn’t mean to.” He closed his eyes and winced at how stupid that sounded. “I didn’t want to, Baby Boy. It just kept getting worse and I didn’t know how to...”

“You didn’t want to,” Tyler repeated, looking at his brother. Some part of him had hoped that Gary had seduced him. It would have still been damnable for his step-father but force was worse. “How did it start?” Tyler demanded, voice grating in the back of his throat.

Those blue eyes turned from panicked to pleading, his mouth moving but not find words to beg him not to ask. How many times had Reid thought about this moment? How many nights had he laid awake with the fear that he would find out? That this would ruin them?

Tyler felt sick, he wanted space but he couldn’t bare to push Reid off of him. If he hadn’t been seduced, then there was really only one other reason why a young Reid Garwin would let this happen. There was only one thing that would make Reid go into the dark quietly without a fight and that was his brothers. “It was me, wasn’t it,” he said it more than asked it, staring back at his best friend. “Did he threaten me to get you to play along?”

Gary had already started back peddling away from this scene. It hadn’t gone the way he had imagined. Tyler didn’t seem angry at Reid at all. He had put a good amount of space between himself and the sons but was still on the ice. When he turned away from them with the intent of making a run for the house and his truck, he saw the last person he expected standing there.

Caleb stood in front of him. Bloody but not broken. There was nothing forgiving in the shadows of his face beneath the smears of drying red. Gary moved to swing the bat but there was no poison left in Caleb’s system to slow his limbs. He caught the bat in mid air and ripped it from the man’s hands before swinging it himself. Gary screamed with his leg broke and his body buckled onto the ice.

Reid winced at the sound but didn’t dare to look away from Tyler. “It wasn’t much at first but it kept escalating and...”

Tyler felt like his chest was caving in around his heart. “The blow jobs,” he mumbled. “The holidays.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “Every year. You came with me every year.”

Reid’s hands tightened in the front of Tyler’s shirt, as though preparing to hang on when his friend would push him away. “I’m sorry, Ty. I’m so sorry. At first he said he’d go after you if I didn’t and then.. and then he said he’d tell you. Please. Please, forgive me. I’m sorry.” Reid was practically yelling, frantic in his desperation to make him understand it was malicious, he hadn’t meant to ruin his brother’s family. He hadn’t meant for any of it to happen.

Tyler found himself shaking his head and grabbing at Reid, pulling him against him to try to smother those pleas. “Shut up. Shut up,” he begged in whispers, one hand cradling the back of his head and burying his fingers in the back of his hair. “You don’t have to apologize. You took care of me,” he assured, kissing that blond head. “You always took care of me, Reid.” He held him tight until Reid’s shaking started to calm.

He realized that Pogue had stood up, but not left their side. He wasn’t looking at them, but at something behind them.

Tyler turned his head just in time to hear another scream and the cracking of bones. Caleb looked like a nightmare. He didn’t need to Use to be a terror. Tyler loosened his hold on Reid, letting him go slowly until those tired blue eyes looked up at him. “I’m going to take care of you,” Tyler promised and leaned forward, kissing his brother’s temple before standing and leaving him there on the ice.

He left him with Pogue and walked back to where Caleb stood. He had stopped his assault and was now just watching the man at his feet squirm and beg. Gary’s arm was bent at the wrong angle and a bone was jutting out of his leg.

When he saw Tyler coming, hope sparked in his eyes. Caleb didn’t move, still holding the bat loosely in one hand, the heavy end resting against the ice by his shoe.

“Tyler! Tyler, they’re insane!” Gary sounded, his good arm reaching toward his step-son. “I’ve been good to you and your mom! We’re family! That slut seduced me!”

Tyler felt Caleb watching him, waiting. Tyler didn’t bother to look back. He sighed and walked straight toward Gary, bending over to grab him by the back of his jacket before he started dragging him. “I told you not to call him that,” Tyler muttered, pulling the man’s weight. He could feel his brothers watching him, all of them. They would do it for him if he asked or if he simply stopped and let Gary go. They would make sure it was over. “And you don’t know what family is.”

Gary was coughing, choking on saliva and blood in his struggle against the pulling of his body toward that hole in the ice. “Tyler, you can’t do this!” he shouted in his parental voice. “What will your mother say?”

“My mother? You mean the one you talked into drugging my brothers so you could kill them and then lying to me about it?” Tyler shook his head, tears in his eyes though they never quite fell. “I don’t have a mother.” He gave his step-father’s jacket a good tug to slide him forward onto that ledge of ice. Gary immediately started clinging to it, trying to get a hold of something. “I have brothers,” Tyler explained dryly. “That’s all I need.” He kicked the man in the shoulder to have him falling into the water. He splashed and he screamed but Tyler’s eyes went black and the ice started to grow again, freezing over that hole until all Gary could do was beat his fist against the underside. The drum grew weaker and weaker until it was silent at last.

Tyler stood there long after, staring at the ice.

Caleb walked around to his other side, to stand between Tyler and the others and look at Reid. Reid seemed completely out of it, just staring at Tyler and waiting for him to look back. He didn’t. Caleb tossed the bat off to the side and it rolled away. “Po, get him to the car and grab our stuff.” His voice sounded harsh but no one flinched. He knew Pogue would take care of it, would take care of them and he did. He reached down and grabbed Reid by the arms, hauling him to his feet before starting to pull him along across the lake and back toward the house.

Caleb waited until the blonds were out of ear shot before turning to look at Tyler. “Baby Boy,” he said, his voice steady and patient.

Tyler continued to stare at the ice. There was a body under there.

“Tyler.”

He exhaled and closed his eyes. “What?”

“You did the right thing,” Caleb assured. His voice always steady.

Tyler nodded a little. “I know. He killed you,” he said and remembered his brother’s body in the living room. “I’m sorry.”

Caleb’s hand found that space between Tyler’s shoulder and his neck, squeezing it and standing behind him.

“You knew about Reid,” Tyler said and his voice was just as cold.

Caleb stilled, staring at the back of his brother’s head, feeling that distance between them even when they stood so close.

“That’s why you were with him this week. That’s why you slept with him?”

Caleb’s hand let go of the back of Tyler’s neck. “I slept with him because I wanted to.”

“Why did he sleep with you?” There was a sneer there, something angry and cold and it had Caleb taking a step back in surprise. Tyler turned around to look at him and those once innocent and naive eyes were full of malice. “You didn’t even wonder if it was because you were a better alternative to Gary creeping in his room at night? Or if you were just taking advantage of the situation?” Tyler sounded surprised, his mouth curling with disgust before he started to walk past him and toward the car. “At least you kept it a secret long enough to get a good fuck out of it.”

Caleb finally felt the cold of the winter around him. “Tyler!” he snapped, body turning to glare at his youngest brother. He knew it was just him letting off steam. Tyler was angry, he was hurt and more than anything, he probably felt guilty. Caleb knew all of that and understood that this was him lashing out, but still those words crept into his heart and made it shudder.

When Tyler didn’t stop, Caleb ran after him, grabbing him by the arm and turning him around. “You know it wasn’t like that.” He hissed through his teeth. “He asked me not to tell you and not to do anything that would ruin your family.”

Tyler grimaced and turned around to look up at him. “He is my family, Cay. So you fucked up.” With both hands he shoved his brother away from him. He had never really pushed Caleb in all his life. Sure, he’d grabbed him once or twice to pull him off a fight and even gotten between him and Reid on occasion but he had never pushed him outright.

Caleb growled and resisted the urge to let power wash over him. Again, he knew he should let it go. Let Tyler cool off. “You’re just angry because I figured it out!” he roared. As it turned out, Caleb was angry too. “How many years have you been sitting at that damn table with them and you never saw it? How many times were you in the other room while your step-dad-” Power slammed against him and threw him back. His heels cracked the ice but he didn’t sink. His eyes were black and his arm deflected the second attack on his way back to Tyler. “You should have known!” he shouted, his own voice surprising him. His limbs shook with the anger he hadn’t even realized was there. “You should have seen it!”

Tyler howled and threw another wave of power at him.

Caleb ground his teeth and shoved it away, letting it bore another hole in the lake far from them. “I’m not sorry you had to kill Gary! I wouldn’t even be sorry if you had to kill your bitch mother!” Caleb grabbed Tyler by the collar and ignored the way their powers lashed at each other, Tyler trying to hurt him while he simply pushed it all away. He pulled his little brother closer, until he was practically on his toes. “We’re brothers and he is _ours_! Ours to protect and love and suffer for! It was your job to put that son of a bitch in the ice and you did it!” He pressed his forehead to Tyler’s and took a deep breath before letting it out shakily and relenting some of his fury. His voice softened, dark and tired. “You did it,” he said it as though it needed to be known, as though Tyler might have forgotten. “You did your job.” He held him there for a while longer. He had stopped lashing out and his eyes had gone back to those soft browns.

Caleb let go of him slowly and Tyler staggered back when he finally could, shaking his head and looking anywhere but at Caleb. His breath made thick clouds in the cold. “He’ll be okay, right?” he said it as though he knew he would be and couldn’t understand how.

“Yes,” Caleb replied with all certainty.

“But I wouldn’t have been,” Tyler murmured at last, a truth he hadn’t even realized terrified him. He looked at Caleb and at last those brown eyes were the innocent ones he remembered, only now slightly worn. “I wouldn’t have been alright if it had been me, would I?”

Caleb stared back at him for a moment before sighing and looking away, toward the house. “No. It might have haunted you forever and it would have destroyed Reid if something like that happened to you. It would have destroyed all of us,” he admitted quietly.

Tyler stared at him, miserable, tears overflowing. “Why? Why is it okay that it was Reid?”

“It’s not okay,” Caleb said clearly. “But it’s different.”

“Why?”

“He’s Reid.” Caleb took a deep breath and then just shook his head. “You remember when you two went to camp with your school? It was just for your grade so it was just the two of you.” He didn’t wait for Tyler to nod or answer. “Some kids started bullying you because you were small and nice.”

“Weak,” Tyler muttered.

“And Reid wasn’t very big either and there were too many of them for him to protect you alone so he went up to another boy, when everyone else was around, and he confessed having a crush on him and tried to kiss him.”

Tyler smiled unhappily and started scrubbing the heels of his palms against his cheeks to push away those tears. “He didn’t even like that boy.”

“No. He did it because it gave them a new target. Because after that they started harassing him for being gay.”

Tyler’s eyes darkened and he nodded. Reid had taken a beating just about every day of camp.

“He can take it,” Caleb explained, though he obviously didn’t like the truth of it. “What he could never take, was seeing you get hurt.”

“I should have taken care of him then too,” Tyler whispered bitterly. “But this isn’t the same thing-”

“Yes it is. He takes care of you because you’re younger than him and Po and I were supposed to take care of him but we weren’t able to be there.” Caleb sighed and looked back at the house. “This was like camp. We weren’t there and he did the best he could.” He started walking then and for a moment he considered stopping, considered reaching for Tyler, but he decided against it and hoped he would start walking with him. “You’ll have to think of it that way if you’re going to survive knowing about it.”

Tyler followed. He had no choice and to be honest, it came naturally to him to follow his brothers. “How do you know that will work?”

Caleb was quiet for a while before finally answering. “Because that’s what I had to do to live with it.”

Tyler picked up his step until he could walk with him. Without the anger in his chest, he just felt lonely. “I’m sorry...” he started but Caleb made an annoyed sound. An arm slung over his shoulders.

“Shut up,” the eldest said. “Let’s just go home.”


	10. Punishment

Pogue walked Reid back to the car, away from the lake. He kept expecting Reid to say something but he didn’t. He just let his brother lead him away. Pogue might have shaken him out of his stupor if it wasn’t momentarily preferable to making him face reality. He put him in the backseat of the car and closed the door. He held the keys in his palm, pressing the bits of metal into his skin when he went up the front steps of Tyler’s family home again.

The door was still open. He didn’t look into the living room at the blood but the black wash of his eyes made it disappear when he passed. Tyler’s mom was still sitting in the hallway crying, the smell of dinner burning somewhere beyond her. Pogue didn’t look at her either. He went straight upstairs, his eyes flashed midnight and everything they had brought was back into their bags. He looked down at them, neatly packed and zipped and then made them disappear, sent to the back of the SUV Reid was waiting in.

It was almost like they’d never been there at all. Almost and yet this place would never been the same. When he came back downstairs, Mrs. Simms was standing in the open doorway, looking out at the car, at the tinted windows. She started to take a step forward but Pogue’s hand grabbed her shoulder, pulling her back and spinning her away to the side easily. Dark brown eyes warned her not to try it again. He walked back outside and only then did his fingers uncoil from the keys, letting them swing in the cold air form his fingers, their shapes imprinted in his palms.

He tossed a look over the hood of the car and out toward the lake. Caleb and Tyler were still out there and whatever they were talking about was looking more like a screaming match. Pogue rounded the car and got into the backseat next to Reid.

The door closed and there was finally quiet, without the wind. He looked at his brother and frowned. Reid was staring out the tinted window at Caleb and Tyler out there on the ice. “He was dead.”

Pogue tensed and then shrugged it off. “So were you.”

Reid looked down at his lap. “I never thought it would turn out like this,” he admitted, his voice low and tired.

Pogue nodded shortly and then sighed and reached out. He grabbed Reid by the shoulders and pulled him across the seat and to his chest. He was prepared for the younger blond not to want the comfort or affection but he was relieved when he leaned easily into it. Reid pulled his legs up onto the seat where he had previously been, his ass now planted in the middle of the backseat and his back and shoulders leaned into Pogue’s chest. Those arms wrapped around him and he dropped his head into the front of that shirt. He was so tired. He’d ruined their lives and though it felt like it had happened all at once, it had been a long time coming.

* * *

Reid didn’t realize he was falling asleep until he woke up. It was dark out and the forests and mountains had been replaced by tall buildings and asphalt. He sat up and Pogue’s arms moved to let him go. The silence in the car was tangible and he realized it almost as soon as he woke. One hand scrubbed over his face. No one was talking to anyone. No one was even looking an anyone else. Tyler was sitting in the front seat and Caleb was driving.

The were back in their own city and before Reid could even try to think of a way or reason to break the silence, Tyler spoke. His voice was strange, hard. “Drop us off at our place.”

Caleb looked at the youngest and for a minute Reid thought he would argue, but then he looked at the road again and took a right. Silence returned until they pulled up to the apartment complex. Almost as soon as the car stopped, Tyler got out. Reid suddenly wasn’t sure if he should get out too. Was he welcome? It would break his heart if Ty didn’t want him to come home but he’d understand too. Before he could figure out what to do, Tyler opened his door. One steely stare of those brown eyes told him to get out and then the youngest was walking around the car to the back to pull out their bags.

Reid got out of the car.

Caleb sighed and got out as well, taking long strides to the back. “Ty,” he started.

“You should get home,” Tyler said before his brother could say more, never looking up at him. “It’s late.”

Caleb growled but walked back to the front of the car. He looked over the hood at Reid where he stood and then got into the car and closed the door.

Reid could see Pogue talking inside the car, saying something quick and low to his brother, but Caleb didn’t reply. He just kept looking at Reid and Reid found himself stuck looking back until Tyler walked passed him with both of their bags. “Let’s go,” the brunet muttered when he opened the front door of their building.

It felt strange to break that stare. He turned his back to the parking lot and walked inside, taking his bag from Tyler on his way passed. They walked up the stairs and went into their apartment but even though it was exactly the way they’d left it, it wasn’t the same, because they weren’t the same.

Reid found himself waiting. Waiting for Tyler to say something, to yell or cry. But he didn’t. He just dumped his bag in the doorway and then walked into the kitchen. Reid watched his brother look in the cupboards and the fridge, staring at nothing before deciding out loud that they should order something. Tyler tossed him the phone and told him to order chinese while he took a shower.

It wasn’t until he actually heard the spray of the water in the bathroom that he looked down at the phone in his hands. He dropped his bag and walked into the kitchen, dialing a number off of one of the takeout menus and ordering the same shit they usually got. He hung up but kept staring at the menu. Were they really just going to pretend nothing happened? That was something Reid usually did when he was upset with Tyler, not the other way around. Tyler usually wanted to talk about things.

He sat on the couch and waited. When Tyler was done showering he left Reid’s room and crossed the small living room to his own bedroom. He didn’t even look at him. When the food came, they ate together in the living room and then before Reid could even try to say something, Tyler excused himself. He said it had been a long day and he was tired. A long day. Reid stared at him in disbelief and found himself still there, staring when the door closed and he was alone in the living room.

He told himself to let it go, let Tyler process this how every he wanted and be angry how ever he wanted. If this was punishment, then Reid deserved it. He could take the silent treatment. Or so he told himself before his face scrunched angrily and he walked that short distance to his best friend’s door. He threw it open and let it slam against the wall.

Tyler turned to look back at him, surprised. “What?”

“What?” Reid repeated in disbelief. “Are you shitting me? You’re just going to pretend nothing happened?”

Tyler’s lips curled into a near snarl before he bit back whatever he was on the verge of saying. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know! Yell at me! Hit me! Just do it!” Reid panted, tears gathering in his light eyes.

Tyler’s expression sank, the anger draining from his features so quickly that he paled. “What?” He half whispered and half exhaled. “Why would I do that?”

“Because I just ruined your life!” Reid shouted, choking on the last words of it.

Tyler shook his head quickly and took the steps to swallow the space between them. His hand grabbed Reid’s upper arm, squeezing it. “The only way you could have ruined my life is if you hadn’t come back from the ice,” he whispered, staring back at his best friend. “I don’t know what to say to you because everything I want to say is the wrong thing.”

Reid looked back at him. He wanted to be believed but he couldn’t believe it was that simple. “I should have told you. I should have done everything differently but... It just kept getting worse and I didn’t want you to know. I didn’t want us to end up here. I didn’t want to ruin-”

Tyler sighed and pulled him in. They were almost the same height and had been most their lives. He wrapped his arms around Reid and hugged him. “You’re my brother and my best friend.” He leaned his temple to Reid’s and laughed a little. “You’re the first boy I ever fucked and the first one that ever fucked me.” It eased his heart a little when he felt Reid’s body vibrate with a small laugh of his own. “There is nothing you could ever do, not even when you try, that could make me stop loving you.”

Tyler held him tighter when he felt him sigh. He made himself a promise then, that he would be a better brother and never let anything like this happen again. He wasn’t going to be the baby anymore. He couldn’t be.

* * *

“Did you see the way he was looking at me?” Caleb seethed, rolling out of the driver’s seat and slamming the door behind him.

Pogue sighed and smiled lazily. “He’ll get over it.”

“You didn’t hear what he was saying out there.”

The blond almost lost his smile but he kept it, looking up at the dark sky before turning his head toward his brother where he stood at the front door of his house. Cay was rolling his keys in his hand, finger pinching the right one. Whatever Baby Boy had said out there on the lake had been enough to bruise something inside of Caleb. “He didn’t mean it.”

“Po, you don’t know what--”

“He didn’t mean it,” the blond said again and the certainty of his voice had his dark haired brother turning his head to look at him across the walkway. Pogue stared back at him. “He’s your brother. You love him and he loves you and if what he said hurt you then he didn’t mean it, and you know that.”

Caleb drew a breath and let it out, the air clinging to the shape of it as though they needed the reminder that it was still winter. “You’re not coming in?”

Pogue smiled and rolled his shoulder, taking a backward step toward the garage where he’d left his motorcycle. “Gotta make sure no one’s robed my place.”

Caleb laughed. It sounded tired but true. He put the key into the lock and turned it. Pogue heard the door opening on his way to the garage. “The only thing you have worth stealing is parked in my garage,” Caleb mumbled.

Pogue smiled and lifted an arm, waving his brother off before making his way around to the door on the back side of the garage. He had his own key. “The only thing I have worth stealing is you,” he whispered and only the night heard.

He was home in twenty minutes, his bike back in his own garage of oil stains and a few partially constructed motorcycles. He locked it up, went inside, dumped his bag and jacket and threw himself into his bed. It was just as unmade as it had been when he left and it still smelt like Tyler from the night before they left. Ty’s shirt was lost under the pillows. He had looked awkward when he left wearing on of Pogue’s. Baby Boy didn’t like being reminded that he had a smaller build.

When he woke he wasn’t entirely sure he had fallen asleep. He lifted his head and laid his cheek back down, cracking an eye to see the glowing time of his clock on the bedside table. Four in the morning. A fist pounded at his door and he realized it wasn’t the first time. With a groan and a few grumbles, he pushed himself out of bed and made his way to the door. He tried to open it once before realizing it was locked and rolling the dead-bolts back. That knocking was persistent but the fist sounded small.

“Hang on,” he muttered before finally opening the door. His face scrunched in confusion at the woman standing on his porch. “Gabby?” he asked, eyes straining to stay open.

His sister looked flushed and her eyes were wide. “Tell me it isn’t true. Tell me you didn’t break the oath?”

His face scrunched more, his fingers pressing into the door he still held open. “What are you talking about?”

“Did one of you kill Tyler’s dad?”

“His step-dad,” he corrected and saw her eyes widen and her body reel when she took a step back. It must have been enough to be an admission. “How did you even hear about that?”

“Hear about it? You killed someone in the family!”

He hissed at her raised volume. “Not your family,” he reminded as though that should be enough for her.

She shook her head and he could see her mind racing in her eyes. “You and the others took an oath, Po! You swore you wouldn’t turn on your families, that you wouldn’t use against us!”

“He didn’t...”

“Who? Which one did it?” She sounded desperate then, taking a step closer to him. She looked hopeful and he suddenly realized that she was afraid. Not of him, but of something else.

“Why are you here?” His voice sounded suddenly distant and he felt cold. Gabby had never been one to panic or interfere. She was married with two kids and ran a company. She had made it clear that she didn’t have time for family drama.

“If it was one of the others, maybe I can get you out of this.” She reached out and grabbed his arm. “Which one killed Tyler’s dad?”

He pulled his arm away from her. “Step-dad,” he reminded again. “If one of us did it, we all did it.”

She recoiled from those words, taking a few steps back and shaking her head in disbelief. “Then you’re all going to pay for it, Po,” she whispered and he heard the regret in her voice.

“What are you talking about?” It was his voice that was rising now.

She took another step back, away from him, this one taking her down from the porch and onto the sidewalk. “You broke the oath. You swore you wouldn’t use against family. Without that, we can’t be sure you won’t turn on the rest of us.”

His eyes narrowed and he followed her out of the house, standing on his porch in the cold air. “What did you do?”

“Not me.” She shook her head and he saw the tears gathering in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Po.”

“Gab-” He was taking another step toward her when he felt his head throb and his knees buckled to land him on the icy sidewalk. His head pulsed with every beat of his heart, the pain straining his features. He looked up at her. “What’s happening?”

She was crying and she dropped to her knees with him and wrapped her arms around him. It was more frightening than if she had just left him there and run for her car. “You’re going to be okay. Everyone is going to be okay.”

“Gab...” He ground out, his teeth clenching against the pain. He heard another car pull up but couldn’t see straight enough to recognize it.

“The families have always had a plan for it the sons turned on them, Po. They won’t hurt you. We would never hurt you,” she promised, hugging him tightly. “But we can’t let you be together anymore. It’s too dangerous.”

He tried to push her away but his head felt like it was splitting open. There was someone else close by, talking to Gabby. Was that his mom? He wanted to stand, wanted to run, but all he could do was curl closer to the concrete and try to breathe. There was a squealing in the back of his head that spread, growing louder and louder until it felt like it was pouring in through both of his ears and it wasn’t a squeal at all. It was a scream. It was his scream.


	11. Who?

Pogue was having a bad day.

He had an exam in about thirty minutes that he wasn’t entirely sure he was going to pass and may very likely force him to take the class again next semester. He had an engine in his garage he could not for the life of him get to start. Summer hadn’t even officially started and it was already so hot that he could cook an egg on the sidewalk and, on top of everything else, his girlfriend of the last three months had showed up at his house and burst into tears.

Through her heaves of breath and huffs of apologies he caught enough of what she was saying to figure out that she had been drinking at a party last night- the one he had skipped to actually study- and had slept with another guy. He blinked across the coffee table at her. She wasn’t very pretty when she cried but few people were. “You fucked someone else?” he asked, wanting to clarify.

Heather heaved a breath, pushing the tears from her cheeks. “It was a mistake!” she exclaimed.

He wasn’t entirely sure why she was telling him. “Who was it?”

She sniffled, large eyes looking back at him. “Does it matter?”

He laughed a little but it wasn’t a very happy sound. “Well, not to you, but it kind of does to me.”

She swallowed hard and rubbed a few more tears from her cheeks. “His name is Caleb Danvers. He’s in my history class,” she explained and he was surprised that she even batted her eyelashes at him.

Pogue strained to remember the name before narrowing his eyes. “The dark haired guy from the swim team? You cheated on me with a guy from the swim team?” He sighed and stood up. At least it wasn’t with someone he knew. He rubbed the back of his neck and then shook his head against whatever he was thinking about saying.

“I have a test,” he muttered, grabbing his bag off of a chair and starting for the door.

She stood and followed anxiously. “So you forgive me?”

Pogue laughed loudly, holding the door open for her and waiting until she stepped out into the sweltering heat to say, “Fuck, no.” He closed the door behind himself and locked it. “But we had a good run,” he assured even when she started sobbing again. He left her standing there on his porch and got on his bike. Every day the temperature climbed he considered more and more whether or not he really needed the helmet. Since he was on his way to a test he figured he should at least pretend to safeguard his brain-matter until he got there.

His friends were going to give him shit about this--being cheated on didn’t exactly make a guy look good. He knew he should have dumped her last week when Anna started flirting with him. Now Anna would look like a second choice and that would make the whole thing too much work on Pogue’s part. Who else was single right now? His mind was considering options when he pulled into the busy school parking lot. It always seemed like there were twice as many students on campus during finals week.

He was pulling into a parking spot just as some guy made a dash across it. Pogue hit the breaks but managed to clip the kid in the back of the leg with the front tire of his motorbike. The small brunet fell onto the pavement. Pogue let out a curse, taking off his helmet and kicking down the stand. “Fuck man, are you alright?” he called, turning off the engine and hopping off the bike to help him up.

Tyler hissed, a strong hand pulling him upright again while he looked at the burn the street had left on his forearm. “Alright? You hit me with your damn bike! What are you-” He was sputtering when he finally looked up. He choked on whatever he was going to say when he found himself inches away from a rather tall blond in a tank top that showed off every muscle his arms had to offer.

“Hey, to be fair, you went running across the parking lot,” Pogue countered. “Be glad it was a bike and not a truck.”

Tyler blinked and then jerked his arm away from the stranger. “Oh, shit! I’m late!” he said, remembering why he was running to begin with. He made it too steps before he fell over again. His leg felt numb. Was that normal? “What did you do to me?”

“I hit you with my bike. Did you hit your head when you fell down?” Pogue asked, grabbing the other guy again and pulling him to his feet. “Stand still for a fucking second and I’ll help you.” His day was getting worse.

“I don’t have a second!” Tyler shouted but couldn’t do much other than watch the guy move his bike fully into the parking spot and grab his bag.

“Which building?” Pogue asked on his way back to him, grabbing his arm again and lifting half his weight before they started walking.

Tyler hopped along with him irritably. “Wesner Hall. My exam starts in... like now!” he shouted angrily.

“Hey! You’re the one that was late!” Pogue reminded before sighing angrily. They were too far to make it at this pace. “Fuck. Fine, but I don’t want you showing up with a lawyer saying you have whip lash or some shit later on, you got it? I get you to your test and we’re square.”

Tyler looked up at his confused, his nose scrunching like his eyebrows. “What? Yeah, fine. You get me to-” His words cut off with sheer disbelief when the larger guy grabbed his waist and hoisted him up. He let out a breath when his stomach landed on that shoulder and he found himself staring at the ground behind them and the other guy’s heels as he ran. “What the fuck?” he snapped but didn’t dare to move or kick, amused faces and buildings breezing past. This might actually work.

When Tyler was being put on his feet again, this time in the air conditioned insides of Wesner Hall, he was more than a little impressed. “W-What did you say your name was?”

Pogue laughed, pushing hair out of his face and taking a few steps back. “I didn’t and I’m not. Like I said,” he pointed at Tyler. “we’re square now, so don’t get any ideas.”

Tyler stood there and watched the stranger turn and disappear out of the hall. Not get ideas? Oh, he was going to have a lot of ideas about this, but none of them were going to involve lawyers.

“Shit,” he heard someone say next to him and turned to look up at Ryan, his roommate. “What happened to you?” the dark haired tech major asked with raised eyebrows.

Tyler looked down at himself. Jeans ripped and dusted in dirt. “I have a test.” He answered as he remembered, turning and throwing himself through the door.

* * *

Caleb had expected to have the pool to himself. Formal practices were over and just about everyone was in a panic over exams before summer break. Caleb didn’t really panic. He studied and more often than not, he was the first one done with the test and held the highest scores.

The indoor pool escaped the heat outside, but the large windows aloud the pretend of outdoors. His bare feet padded along the floor, hands pulling the towel from around his neck to drop it over a chair on his way to the edge of the water. It wasn’t empty. The small ripples lapped against the edges and he watched the lone figure swim a lap toward him. Lean body with tight muscles and a decided lack of swim shorts.

Caleb smirked when no one was there to see, the smile vanishing when the blond reached the edge where he stood. One hand touched the side of the pool, head lifting from the water to breath. Blue eyes looked up at him, surprised but not at all abashed. They stared at each other for a second before the blond reached up one arm, hand open and waiting.

Caleb reached down, grabbing that arm and letting it grab his to hoist him up out of the water. There was a splattering of sound when the droplets rolled off of his naked body and back into the pool. “Are you new?” Caleb asked, voice dark and sounding unamused. He was good liar because this was the most amusing thing that had happened to him all year.

The naked blond smiled up at him. “Nope,” he said simply before walking around him, picking up a towel on the ground.

“Not a fan of shorts?” Caleb stayed where he was, at the edge of the pool, looking back over his shoulder at the other man casually.

Reid smiled. “Just a bigger fan of dicks,” he admitted and Caleb was surprised how infectious that smile was. It was bold and more than a little wicked. With his towel now slung over his head, the stranger started to walk toward the locker rooms.

“You weren’t bad. You should try out for the team at the end of the summer,” Caleb said, voice raised just enough that it would carry.

The blond laughed. “I’m not a team player,” he countered.

Caleb looked at the water. “It’s swimming. It’s not exactly a team sport.”

The blond didn’t reply and Caleb stayed at the edge of the pool, watching the water calm. When the locker room door closed, the click echoing through the large empty pool hall, the brunet dove into the now still water. After the first lap he forgot the other completely until he was getting out of the pool forty minutes later. Rubbing his towel into his hair, he couldn’t help but remember that odd smile. If he wasn’t new, how had Caleb not noticed him before? He shrugged off the idea and headed for the locker rooms.

He had another exam at four. It lasted and hour and he had been more than ready to head home when a few of his classmates talked him into going out instead.

All and all, his day had been going pretty good. By ten he was at a bar playing pool and had a red head whispering things in his ear that amounted to a promising night. When someone grabbed his shoulder and turned him, he certainly hadn’t been expected the fist that struck out or the knuckles that mashed a bruise into his cheek and sent him falling back against the pool table.

His lips curled in a snarl when he sat up on the table to look at his attacker. Caleb had at least expected to recognize the guy. “Who the hell are you?”

The tall blond frowned at him. “Pogue,” he said and Caleb assumed that was a name. “You fucked my girlfriend last night.” He spat before he threw another fist his way.


	12. Making Friends

Pogue fell through the front door of the bar and onto the sidewalk. He hadn’t really expect the swim team nerd to be able to hold his own in a fight, let alone send him rocking. He pushed himself back up to his feet just in time to see the brunet pushing his way out the front door to follow him. His pale cheek was red and soon to bruise from that first punch and his lip bleeding from the second. Pogue couldn’t help but smile smugly.

“I think you’ve got the wrong guy,” Caleb snapped and it sounded more like an accusation than a defense.

Pogue spit blood onto the pavement of the parking lot. “You’re Danvers, aren’t you?”

The brunet frowned even more. “Yeah. But I haven’t been fooling around with anyone’s girlfriend.”

Pogue raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Heather Smith,” he said and watched those dark eyes blink back at him without recognition.

Caleb shook his head, hands still balled into fists. “Listen man--”

“She has a rose tattoo on her hip,” Pogue added and saw the moment Caleb’s mouth snapped shut, a slow smile pulling at his mouth. “That’s what I thought.”

“Alright,” the brunet conceded, lifting one hand peaceably. “But I didn’t know she was with anyone.”

Pogue nodded, rubbing his knuckles along his mouth to push away the blood that tried to stain his lips. “Yeah, I figured but everyone knows so I kind of had to hit you,” he admitted casually, smiling at the smear of his own blood on the back of his hand. “Gotta admit, I didn’t expect you to be so good in a fight.”

Caleb watched the blond skeptically but lowered his shoulders. “Have we met before?”

Pogue smirked. “Why? Something familiar about my knuckles?”

Caleb let out a low laugh then and shook his head. “Just something familiar.” He uncoiled his fists and straightened his shirt. “So what’s the protocol here? I slept with your girlfriend--you punched me in the face--who owes who a drink here?”

Pogue laughed and walked toward him. They were both momentarily tense when they came into arms reach of one another, some part of them expecting the fight to start again, but Pogue pushed passed him and held the door open. “You buy me a drink and then I’ll bring you along to a party later tonight?” he suggested.

Caleb nodded with a shrug and followed him in. “Sounds like a start.”

* * *

Tyler came around the corner. The halls were dark and the classrooms empty. He’d had one final left for an evening class. When the test had started the school had still been relatively lively. The sun had still been up at least. Now it was a wasteland of prime locations for horror movies.

He was slower on that swollen ankle. He should really get it looked at. He could actually feel it throbbing inside his sneaker. Still, having that stranger carry him on his shoulder to class had almost made it worth it.

He gimped down the hall, closer to that set of double doors with night dark windows. He almost veered into the wall when he heard the sound of a desk scraping along the tile floors of one of the class rooms. His heart quickened and his hand curled around the strap of his bag. He turned and stared at the open door just a handful of steps further down the hall, as though something would emerge, but nothing did.

“You think you can play games with me?” a voice ground out, low and angry inside that room.

Tyler stood still, waiting and blinking at the shadows of the room inside. Someone replied to the voice but he couldn’t make out the words. Another hard sound of furniture moving and then the grunting sound of pain and two more laughs.

Tyler inched closer to the door, standing close to the frame when he craned his neck to see inside.

“Get up, fag,” that first voice growled. Jamie Henders. He was a pain for anyone that got his attention, whether good or bad. He kept a tight pack of friends all from the soccer team and made a habit of pushing people around.

Tyler held his breath when the blond pushed off the wall to stand upright again. He had short blond hair and eyes that shined blue even in the lack of light. He smiled. It wasn’t a nice smile, but it wasn’t afraid or hurt. It was bold and something in that break of lips and glint of teeth looked dangerous.

“What the fuck are you smiling about?” one of Jamie’s friends spat, pushing at his shoulder to have the blond bumping into the wall again.

The blond still stared at Jamie, grinning wider until his mouth parted for words. “If you want to fuck me, you should have asked like everyone else. Now you had to make a big deal about hating me to your friends and when you’re done knocking me around and laughing--when you get up the balls to try to creep into my room and ask for a roll--I’m gonna fuckin taze your nuts.”

Tyler laughed. He hadn’t meant to, but he did, and then all those eyes turned to him. Even the blue ones he’d never seen before.

Reid’s smile softened into a real one when he saw the guy by the door laughing. It was a good sound. And then a fist hit his cheek and sent his face sideways into the wall.

Tyler didn’t consider himself a fighter. In fact, he’d never been in a fight in his life. But all the humor drained out of him when he saw the other guy get hit. He ran forward and shoved a heavy desk hard, pushing it across the room and into Jamie Hender’s hip to have him hitting the wall and momentarily stuck there howling in pain. He reached out and grabbed the arm of the blond, pulling him away from the other two and pushing him toward the door.

A hand grabbed the back of his bag strap, pulling him back. The blond turned when he stopped and grabbed at his arm. He kicked someone behind him and Tyler felt his body fall forward when that hand let go. The blond was laughing now and pulling him into the hallway, out of the classroom. Tyler reached out on their way to the door and pulled the fire alarm, sending blaring sound through the building.

They kept running when they were outside, across the dark campus all the way to the parking lot. The blond finally let go of his arm and Tyler stopped, panting and staring at the stranger. “Who are you?”

The blond turned to look at him. He was barely winded. He smiled and let out a little laugh, as though he had forgotten to introduce himself and it wasn’t that they hadn’t yet had the chance. “Reid Garwin.”

Tyler nodded and held out his hand, body straightening to take deeper breaths. “Tyler Simms.”

Reid shook his hand and then reached into his pocket, fishing out a set of keys. “Thanks for getting me out of there. Do you want a ride or something?”

Tyler thought it was an odd question. Or maybe the way Reid added that ‘or something’ had been odd. “No, that’s alright. The bus should be here soon.”

Those blue eyes looked at him then, surprised and then amused. Reid laughed. “You want to wait around in the dark with those assholes out here looking for us?”

“Well... I mean, I didn’t...” Tyler started and then stopped, shaking his head at himself. “Yeah, I’d love a ride.” He finally admitted and started following the stranger toward the rows of cars. “What classes are you taking? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you--”

“I’m not,” he admitted casually, unlocking a small two door car with the press of a button. “I’m going to start here next semester.”

Tyler laughed and got into the car. “So, what are you doing here before summer break?”

Reid shrugged into the driver’s seat. “Honestly? I was traveling with my mom. She’s not easy to keep up with but it was going good, then she decided I should move here and go to school.” He laughed but the sound was a little empty. “I tried to explain timing to her, but she’s never been one for details.”

He pulled out of the parking lot just as a fire truck was pulling in.

Tyler nodded. “At least your mom is fun. Mine’s been depressed ever since her husband left.”

Reid shrugged again, driving into the city. “I got invited to a party. Do you want to come with or did you want to go home?”

Tyler raised an eyebrow. “How did you get invited to a party? You don’t have any classes.”

Reid cracked a smile. “That doesn’t mean I haven’t been sitting in classrooms or eating in the lunchroom this past week.”

Tyler resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Of course this guy hangs around the school for a week and is already getting invited to parties. The only parties Tyler ever got invited to were the ones involving text books and panic studying.

“So? Verdict?”

“Um...” he hesitated. He hated that he hesitated.

Reid glanced at him and then back at the road. “You kind of saved my night so if you want a wing man or something I’ll do the job.” He grinned at the streets, taking a left. “I can promise to get you laid and make sure you don’t lose any organs or die in your own vomit.”

Tyler laughed, half out of nerves and half out of excitement. “That’s grim...”

“That’s partying.” Reid looked at him. The other guy didn’t look like a partier. He didn’t look like a player or a fighter. But he had stuck his neck out to help him so he could be a good friend for a night. Just one night.

“Alright,” Tyler finally said, though he didn’t sound a hundred percent convinced.

“Great!” Reid decided and sped down the street.

Tyler reached for the strap of his back but found it missing. His heart raced. It must have come off in that class room. He exhaled and looked out the window, not wanting to be that guy who makes a big deal out of some lost notebooks. He could go back tomorrow and look for them. They weren’t worth stealing anyway.


	13. More Then Friends

Tyler’s first thought was that it was loud. How was he even supposed to talk to anyone in this house? It was packed with people but the music was so loud that he could feel it in his soles. It did help him forget the throbbing in his heel, his leg wobbling and dipping when he walked behind Reid. There was a tension in his chest when they entered, as though the strange blond would disappear into the crowd and he would never see him again. He knew it was more than likely but he wasn’t ready for him to be off and onto something else just yet. He enjoyed his attention even if it was unexpected and focused with a strange glee on getting him laid.

That was another source of panic in Tyler’s chest now that he was so very out of his element. When they were getting out of the car and heading up to the house, Reid had told him to let him know when he saw someone he liked. Tyler had realized over the last few months that just about everyone he liked just happened to have a dick between their legs. He wasn’t really bothered by this but he didn’t really know what to do about it or if he wanted to tell anyone.

His worry about how he would be able to talk to anyone with the music so loud was answered when Reid stopped and turned back to him. He leaned in so close that his shoulder touched Tyler’s chest and his cheek brushed his, his mouth almost touching his ear when he spoke. “I’m going to the kitchen to find us drinks, you can take a look around,” the blond said and then he was gone, folded away into walls of shoulders and hips.

Tyler didn’t entirely believe he’d be back but he shouldn’t let himself be the kind of person that needed someone to be his social flotation device in a party. He knew most of these people, even if most of them didn’t really know him.

His ankle was really starting to hurt and it had him looking for a place to sit. He found one after some awkward shuffling through the crowd and disturbing a few that were trying to dance. There was a high table against the wall of the large living room with stools for chairs. He got himself on one and ignored the group clustered around the other side of the table.

To his surprise, it didn’t take long before a pair of girl’s he’d had class with showed up in front of him. They were a little drunk and seemed excited that he was there. They were shouting to make up for the music, smiling and leaning into one another for balance. They asked how his exams went and why they never saw him at these parties before.

* * *

Reid ducked around one guy to get himself into the bright kitchen. The music was a little dull here and the counter was littered with cups and bottles. He looked in a few before finding a couple that weren’t used. From there it was a matter of finding a bottle of cola and a bottle of rum. He was surprised when he turned and someone was holding the bottle of captain morgan out for him. He looked up from the hand, to the shoulder, to the face.

He didn’t recognize him until he saw that eyebrow raised in amusement. “The guy from the pool,” he said aloud and took the offered liquor.

Caleb grinned. “The one with his shorts on.”

Reid smiled and shook his head, topping off the cups in front of him. “A shame for us both.”

Caleb leaned against the counter beside him, tipping his head back. “I don’t remember that bruise on your cheek.”

The blond laughed, picking up the two cups, one in each hand. Blue eyes stared back at deep browns. “Maybe you weren’t looking at my face," he smiled wide, looking the brunet over. “Not that you’re looking much better. Did you win?”

“It was complicated,” he answered with a one shouldered shrug before looking down at the cups Reid was holding. His gaze moved up again to find those blues. “Any chance one of those can be for me?”

Reid’s smile turned into a smirk, tempted for an instant before sidestepping Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome. “Sorry.”

Caleb whistled out his pain and turned to watch Reid go. “Do I get to know your name yet?”

He shook his head but didn’t look back. “Not yet,” he replied before leaving the kitchen.

Reid found Tyler at a table near the wall being talked up by two women. He took a sip of one cup and held the other out to Tyler. He wasn’t surprised when the brunet took it from him without question and took a deep drink. He made a mental note to keep an eye on Tyler. He was naive but it was charming.

They made conversation for a while before the ladies excused themselves in a heap of giggles to the bathroom. They needed all four legs to stay standing. Reid took another long drink before slinging an arm over Tyler’s shoulder. “If you’re interested in one of them, you need to make a move before they get another drink in. Black out drunk is no way to go.”

Tyler blushed and laughed nervously before shaking his head. “Nah, they’re just friends.”

Reid shrugged and leaned on the other boy. He wouldn’t have done it if Tyler hadn’t been sitting. He hadn’t said anything, but he’d noticed that his new friend was limping. “Well, then who are you interested in?” he asked, casting an eye around the crowd before looking at Tyler again.

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m not really...” His words trailed off when a group shifted and he saw the guy that ran into him this morning standing near the stairs. He was sporting a bruise on his cheekbone that wasn’t there before but didn’t seem to notice it. He was laughing with a small group and holding a beer. Tyler watched him drink it. Watched him swallow and then blushed. When he tore his gaze away he realized that Reid was staring at him, not just staring but grinning wide.

“If you’d told me you swung that way, I would have fucked you myself,” Reid said, his smile never losing ground when that blush on Tyler’s face darkened, his brown eyes widening. Reid stood upright and finished his drink. “Stay here. I’ll go see if he’s interested.”

“What?” Tyler half shrieked, grabbing for Reid’s arm to keep him from leaving. “You can’t!”

Reid stopped and looked down at the hand holding onto his arm and then turned. He never stopped moving when he turned around, his body leaning into the space Tyler’s occupied on the stool to lean his face down into Tyler’s. “Don’t let your drink out of your sights and don’t go anywhere,” he said and the sternness of his voice coupled with that mischievous grin made him shiver.

His hand fell away and he was left stunned, clutching his drink and watching this almost stranger cross the crowded floor toward that cluster near the stairs.

* * *

Caleb had returned to Pogue and a couple others, handing him a beer before taking a look around for the blond. He wasn’t too hard to find but Caleb felt a stab of disappointment to see him leaning in to another guy, close enough that it would take almost nothing to make it a kiss. His disappointment was short lived though, because the blond pushed away from his companion and started toward the stairs.

Caleb was trying to decide on a way to stop the blond from going upstairs and maybe earn a little more information about him when he realized that was slowing already. He caught those blue eyes and saw the amusement in them.

Reid stuffed his hands into his pockets and stopped in front of Pogue, Caleb and two other guys Pogue had brought with him from the bar. Their conversation stopped when it became obvious that the blond was waiting. He was looking at Pogue. In fact, he looked him up and down pointedly, making the other blond grin and stand taller, more than ready to be judged.

Blue eyes lingered on the bruise on his cheek before smiling at Caleb for a second and then looking at him again. “You must be ‘complicated’,” he said to everyone but Caleb’s confusion. The dark haired man laughed and the other two looked at him curiously.

Pogue continued to smile at the new face, patient and amused. “I like to think I’m pretty uncomplicated actually.”

“That’s good to hear,” Reid said and took a step closer to him, invading some of his personal space then but Pogue didn’t back up. He looked at the beer in Pogue’s hand. “May I?”

Pogue’s smile moved to the side of his mouth and he held out the bottle, waiting while the blond drank a sip and then handed it back. “I was hoping to be straightforward,” Reid said decidedly and Pogue raised an eyebrow curiously. “Are you interested in men?”

One of the guys they’d been talking to turned a shade of red that neared purple and reached out to push the newcomer. “What the fuck are you--”

Caleb caught his arm before it reached the blond and Pogue shot his teammate a warning look. “Billy, why don’t you go take a walk and cool off.”

Reid stood there patiently, seeming not to notice the flustered stranger at their side.

Pogue smiled down at the other blond and held his beer out again. “Is that your way of asking me out?”

The red faced teammate jerked his arm free of Caleb and sputtered angrily before his friend pulled him away, dragging him toward the kitchen or backyard.

Caleb considered leaving as well but didn’t. He knew it would be rude to stay if they were flirting but he wasn’t ready to go just yet.

Reid took the beer with a thank you. “Not tonight,” he clarified with a mischievous grin that told clearly that he had known he was leading the other on. He turned and took a step back to be standing beside Pogue and Caleb, between them actually. With beer still in hand, he pointed out Tyler where he sat nervously at the table across the room. “You see the brunet there?”

Pogue followed his arm to look through the crowd until he saw the guy holding the red cup. He looked back at them momentarily before blushing and looking away quickly, making Pogue laugh a little. “You’re shitting me.”

Reid looked up at him then, a mix of curiosity and anger already forming under those pale features. “What?”

Pogue shook a hand in the air quickly as though to wash away whatever he could see Reid thinking. “I hit him with my bike this morning. Are you sure he doesn’t want revenge or something?”

Reid blinked at this information before grinning and shrugging. “Maybe. I mean, I don’t know what his kinks are...”

“You’re just playing match maker?” Pogue asked, sounding a little skeptical.

Reid shrugged and finished the other man’s beer. “What can I say? I like seeing people get laid.... that didn’t come out right.” He scrunched his face and Caleb and Pogue both laughed.

Pogue stood against the wall, looking across the room and seemed to be considering the outcomes of the situation for a moment before sighing with a smile and pushing away from the wall. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Cay,” he called to his friend before a hand grabbed at his shoulder, making him look back at the short blond. “Something else, sweetheart?”

Reid frowned pointedly at the nickname before letting it go. “I don’t know you well. If you mess him up, I’ll mess you up.”

Pogue laughed and his eyes seemed to sparkle with that amusement. “Really?” He sounded skeptical, looking the other guy over. Sure, he was toned, but he wasn’t big.

Reid shrugged and let go of his shoulder, taking a step back to lean against the wall again. He watched Pogue cross the room to stand over Tyler. Tyler almost dropped his now empty cup when he realized he was there, standing up and squirming on that swollen ankle. He could only see Pogue’s back but he could see Tyler talking, his mouth moving fast and his hands still holding onto that cup between them like a frail plastic shield.

Pogue took the cup from Tyler’s hands gently and put it down on the table with all of the others. Whatever he said next had Tyler grinning and blushing, following Pogue toward the front door.

“So, should I just call you Cupid?” Caleb asked, still standing there beside Reid.

The blond laughed and shrugged. “If you want but getting a good pounding isn’t exactly something you see on valentines cards.” He rolled his head to the side on the wall to look up at the brunet. “So... who are you going home with tonight?”

Caleb smiled and shrugged. “Haven’t decided yet.”

“Oh?” Reid sounded almost offended.

Caleb looked away from him and toward the cluster of people dancing. “Lot of good lookin people...” He smirked in the corner of his mouth, not looking at the blond next to him. “And you? Who are you going home with, Cupid?”

Reid laughed low and shook his head, leaning down to put his empty bottle on the floor. “Oh, I’m not going anywhere.” He used the toe of one shoe to step out of the other and then did it again with the other shoe until he was barefoot on the carpet. Caleb couldn’t resist looking when Reid undid his belt and pulled it free of his jeans. He used his shoulders to push off of the wall, dropping his belt and turning while he peeled off his shirt.

His body was pale and lean but cut with muscles. The same body he’d seen this morning getting out of the pool. Reid grinned, rolling those shoulders. He looked at Caleb like he might say something but then he started up the stairs, hands working open the front of his jeans.

Caleb groaned and turned to watch him go, enjoying the view for a moment before he felt someone starting for the stairs to follow Reid. He shot the other man a hard glare before putting his barely touched beer on one of the steps and then taking them two at a time to catch up. When he got to the hallway, Reid’s jeans were hanging on his hips. His arm reached out to the side to run fingers along the wall. He tried one door before chuckling and closing it when he found it occupied. He tried another and let the door swing open wide, stopping under the frame and turn his head and look back at Caleb.

Caleb felt like he had to remind himself to breathe. He’d been with plenty of people but somehow they were all distant and hard to remember when he was looking at this blond. He followed Reid into the dark bathroom and kicked the door shut behind himself.

The blond was on him instantly, somehow paler in the moonlight that filtered through the small window. Their mouths collided and he couldn’t get enough of that tongue. Hands were on him, pulling at his shirt until it was gone. They turned and Caleb’s back hit a wall. He opened his eyes and realized that the mirror above the sink counter was across from them, allowing him to see them and the full back of the blond’s naked body. He watched him working open the front of his jeans as though they were other people, as though he wasn’t the one moaning and rolling his skull against the wall when those hands had his cock.

He watched the blond sink down to the floor and before he could imagine forming words, his sex was enveloped by that mouth, sucked into warmth and the forceful strokes of a slick tongue. He watched himself there, in that reflection, like a stranger. He had his hand in the back of those short locks, cradling that head that bobbing in front of his crotch. Caleb moaned and then caught his own gaze in the mirror. It was like staring at someone familiar but strange. He didn’t feel like he knew himself but when he looked at the blond, he was certain that he knew him completely.

The blond moaned around his dick and his eyes closed with a moan. He shivered and for a moment stilled. When he opened his eyes again they flashed with fire and a see of ink. Suddenly he forgot the mirror. He forgot himself. He grabbed Reid by the shoulders and pulled him up and off of himself, lifting him and moving them both across that short space of room to have him leaned against the counter. He pulled at one thigh, lifting it, and used his other hand to guide his saliva slick sex.

Reid looked flushed, caught in the moment. His mouth opened for words but before he could get any together he was moaning, his body being stretched and filled. He grabbed at Caleb’s shoulder and dug fingers into muscle when he started thrusting inside of him. His head rolled back to press against the mirror, straining it around his skull.

Caleb kept his brother’s thigh held tight and high, thrusting deep and moaning in satisfaction even before he reached his end. From heavy lids, he watched the other pant for air, moaning and pulling at his shoulder as though he could control the speed of his thrusts with those needy digits. He reached down between them to grab Reid’s cock, stroking it.

It was like a dream that he was happily stuck in, completely unaware what had brought them into this bathroom, whose bathroom it was, or why he felt like it had been years since he touched Reid. He thrust in time with his strokes and watched Reid shudder, getting close to the edge. “Come on... Let go.” He whispered, wanting to see him fall a part before he did. “Come on, Reid. Just let go,” he goaded and moaned.

Those blue eyes burst open and he saw a strange flare of surprise and alarm in them just before Reid burst, his cum wetting their chests. Caleb followed, unable to hold out any longer.

Before he could catch his breath or press another kiss to that sweaty neck, Reid was pushing his chest and shoving him back and away. Caleb blinked in confusion at the face of the blond now scrunched up and still panting. “What? What the fuck?”

“What?” Caleb hissed back.

“How do you know my name?”

“What?”

“You said my name,” Reid snapped, those blue eyes full of mistrust. “How did you know my name?”

Caleb blinked at him. “What the fuck are you talking about? Why wouldn’t I know your name?” He stared his brother, watching him grab up a towel and wipe himself off before making a scramble for his jeans. “The fuck is your problem, Reid?” he demanded but the blond was already storming out, the bathroom door slamming behind him.

Caleb mumbled a curse before reaching for the towel on the counter and catching sight of his reflection in the mirror. Something was off and his head throbbed when he tried to understand. He leaned closer when he noticed the bruise on his jaw. Where had that... Pogue. The bar. They had become friends... His head throbbed again and he had to close his eyes and focus on breathing.


	14. Falling

Caleb sat on the bathroom floor. He didn’t remember sitting. The heels of his palms were pushing into his temples, pressing at his skull. He couldn’t breathe right. Nothing made sense. He had met Pogue tonight. They had become friends. How was that possible when he remembered knowing Pogue as a child? There was no year of his life that he did not remember him.

And Reid. Reid who thought he shouldn’t know his name. A part of him understood. He had seen the blond for the first time today, when he climbed out of that pool, but that couldn’t be. He had known him all his life. He had been small when he was a child, too small, and he had made up for it with big attitude.

He groaned and pressed at his skull, straining bone.

A fist banged at the door and then threw it open. A whistle and a laugh, words followed but an uneasy question. He looked up to see a face he recognized but didn’t. Someone from school. Nothing quite felt real.

“You okay, man? You high or something?” The guy put his beer down and took a step into the bathroom. “Caleb?”

“Where’s Po?” Cay ground out, pushing himself to his feet and realizing that he was still naked. He pulled on his jeans while the other guy kept asking if he wanted some water or coffee or something.

“Where’s Po?” he asked again, voice grinding.

“He went home with that little guy, remember?”

“Where does he live?” Caleb demanded but saw the blank answer in the other man’s face. With a snarl he grabbed his t-shirt and pushed passed him and into the hall. His eyes washed black with edges of fire and he knew exactly where Pogue was.

* * *

Pogue loved the elevator. He loved it because it gave him four floor of groping and sucking that tongue before the doors slid open and he walked them, hips crushed together, into the dark hallway of the apartment complex.

Tyler was an endless surprise. He hadn’t expected this from the nerdy guy he’d carried to class this morning. When walking became difficult, he reached down with one hand to get a hold of that ass and lifted him up, legs wrapped around his waist and Tyler was suddenly taller. He used the height, wrapping arms around his shoulders and burying fingers against his scalp. He moaned into Pogue’s mother when he bumped them into a wall, as though they could get any closer. He grinned wide against the brunnet’s lips because he had every intention of getting them closer. “Which door?” he panted, eyes glazed and smile growing when he realized that Tyler wasn’t listening, he was just grinding his hips and watching his mouth.

Pogue laughed and pulled away from the wall, lifting and lowering Tyler a little to try to remind him that he could be dropped. “Pick a door, or we’re gonna have to fuck right here in the hall.”

Tyler pressed his mouth thoughtfully, the image playing out before his thought before he laughed and pushed himself out of Pogue’s arms, uncoiling his legs to land on the floor. He hobbled to one side when his ankle reminded him that he wasn’t at peek condition but Pogue grabbed his arm before he could fall. “Maybe we should take you to a doctor... you know, tomorrow.” He grinned.

Tyler laughed and started down the hall toward his door, hands digging into the pockets of his shorts.

When he stopped suddenly, just in front of the door, Pogue raised an eyebrow. “Second thoughts?”

Tyler shook his head and his hands came up empty from his pockets. His scrunched face kept a fixed stare on his door. Pogue followed it and frowned, realizing that it was open. “Do you have a roommate?”

Tyler shook his head. He didn’t have his keys either. They were in his bag.

Pogue moved around him to push the door open. It was dark inside but that didn’t stop him from moving quietly in, reaching for the light.

Tyler inhaled sharply and followed him in, reaching to stop him when the lights flared to life. The small one room apartment came to life--a little too much life.

Jamie Henders and one of the guys from the classroom where he had met Reid were standing there near the window. Jamie was smiling and his friend was snapping pictures with his phone. The door closed suddenly and Tyler jumped, the third guy leaning against it just behind him.

“You forgot your bag,” Jamie explained, nudging his chin toward where he’d dropped it. He looked to Pogue and grinned. “Didn’t know you were into guys.”

Pogue stood still, near the middle of the room. “I didn’t know you were into home invasion.” His arms seemed relaxed at his sides but the way they hung with fingers uncurled just away from the thighs of is jeans said otherwise. “What’s the plan, Henders?”

“Got nothing to do with you,” Jamie explained sharply. “You can go.”

Pogue laughed. “I was invited.”

“Well your girlfriend put her nose where it didn’t belong. I want the blond.”

“What blond?” Pogue asked, almost sounding curious, like he didn’t remember Reid--like he could have forgotten.

Jamie ground his teeth, his eyes sliding passed Pogue to look at Tyler. “Where is he?”

“I don’t know,” Tyler replied quickly, very aware of the guy behind him.

“Where does he live?”

“I don’t know. That was the only time I’ve ever seen him.”

“How did you get here? Did he drive you?”

“I drove him,” Pogue interupted. “What’s so great about this blond? Did he really get you this excited, Henders? You’re breaking into apartments and threatening people just to get laid again?”

Jamie snapped with a click of his teeth, lean body lunging forward and fist flying at Pogue’s face. Pogue ducked and punched him in the stomach, body pushing forward to push him back. The guy that had been behind Tyler shoved him out of the way to get into the thick of it, grabbing one of Pogue’s arms and wrenching him back. The second joined in just as quickly, turning a fight into a brawl.

Tyler tried to grab at someone, tried to pull them off of Pogue. He wasn’t sure if it had been Jamie or one of his friend’s but a leg caught him in the gut and threw him back. He hit the wall hard, so hard that he heard it break. Since when do walls break like that? He saw Pogue looking at him, those brown eyes wide and afraid. Why was he afraid?

The window at his back shattered when he hit it and a half a second later it gave way. Tyler fell back and out the window, into the night.

There was a stillness in the room that followed, a half second of terror and disbelief in the four men that remained. Jamie cursed. Pogue shoved arms away from himself to rush forward and lean out, the glass shards in the frame cutting at his palms when he looked down the four story drop at the parking lot. He could barely see him. A blue hoodie and a pale youth. He waited another heartbeat, unable to breathe, but Tyler didn’t move.

When he tore himself away from the window, Jamie and the others were already making a run for it. He couldn’t even think about caring. He ran for the stairs while they took the elevator. He’d beat them to the bottom by a long shot. His heart never beat so fast in his life as it did when he bolted for the door and ran around the side of the building, shouting the other guy’s name.

* * *

Caleb had parked his car and barely turned it off before he got out. He took two steps through the dark lot, toward the front of the apartment building, when he heard the broken glass spraying the ground ahead of him, followed almost immediately by the impact of a body. It made his whole body jump in surprise, dark eyes wide in the night. For half a second he stood there, hands in his pockets, staring at the body. He looked up at the window where it had come from just in time to see Pogue leaving it.

He held his breath when he rushed forward, the chunks of glass crunching under his shoes. He knelt and turned to look at the guy. His heart clenched in his chest and his head throbbed. “Tyler...” he murmured. It was like he was caught in a nightmare. His memories weren’t right. Reid didn’t know him. And Tyler...

His hands shook, his eyes trying to take in all of him. His arm was bent under his body and his leg was broken. Blood was pooling in the pavement under his head and his chest wasn’t moving. He touched his cheek, cupping it. “Baby Boy,” he said almost harshly, as though he could force him to wake up just by command alone.

His teeth ground and his eyes flashed black. It took long, almost too long, to bring life back to that body but when it came, it was explosive. Tyler’s eyes burst open, washed black behind those long lashes, and his chest arched off of the pavement. His limbs tensed and then straightened, his mouth wide and sucking in an endless breath of air.

When he collapsed back it was with deep gasps of air and shudders. He blinked away the inky magic from his eyes and those browns looked back at Caleb, full of confusion and then weighed with understanding. “What happened?” He exhaled, his voice rough and grinding against his throat.

Caleb gave his brother a quick once over, making sure those limbs were whole again. The blood on the pavement was gone. “I don’t know. You fell out a window.”

Tyler sat up and shook his head, bits of glass falling out. “No. What happened? Why did I forget... everything.” His eyes squinted, going through his memories along side his forgotten ones. “Do Reid and Po know?”

As if on queue, they heard Pogue shouting Tyler’s name from around the corner of the building.

“I don’t think so. Reid doesn’t,” Caleb said quickly.

Tyler nodded slowly.

“But I used on you and it seems to have washed whatever was hiding your memories away,” he continued, looking up to see Pogue coming around the corner, sprinting across the parking lot. “If we--”

“No,” Tyler said suddenly, grabbing his arm.

Caleb looked at him, features hard with confusion.

“Don’t remind them.”

“What?”

Tyler swallowed. Pogue would be on them in seconds. “Don’t. Let’s just figure out what happened first.” Caleb remained tense, kneeling beside him. “Just don’t do it yet.” The youngest almost pleaded and something in Caleb’s dark eyes told him when his brother had given in. He let go of his arm just as Pogue was sliding onto his knees in the glass beside him.

“Are you alright?” Po asked, out of breath. He looked up at Caleb in a moment of confusion and then back down at Tyler, his arms coming around him to touch the back of his head and run down his spine. “Call an ambulance, man,” he told Caleb in a rush.

Tyler laughed uncomfortably and shook his head. “I think I’m fine.”

“You fell out a window.”

Tyler pretended to check his limbs. “Seriously, I feel fine.” He grabbed at Pogue’s shoulder. “Help me up.”

“You fell out of a window,” Po said again, slower this time as though the brunet might have a concussion.

Tyler stood and Pogue was forced to follow. “I think being drunk might have saved my life for once.” He laughed and started brushing the glass from his hoodie and jeans.

Caleb stood up as well. “How did he go through the window?”

Tyler shot him a warning look that Pogue didn’t see but the blond was already answering, still marveling at Tyler. “Some guys were at his place. We got into a fight...”

Caleb shot Tyler a pointed frown but at least if he knew about his powers now, he’d be able to take care of himself. “You should stay with Reid or something until your window gets fixed,” he suggested before remembering that they might not know each other that well.

“There’s a hotel a block away,” Tyler said smoothly.

Caleb nodded and started for his car. He was uncomfortable being so close to Pogue while hiding something from him. They had kept secrets from Tyler and Reid on occasion, but never from each other.

“Cay!” Po called after him. “What were you doing here?”

Caleb paused and for a split second looked blankly ahead into the night before tossing his head back. “I was dropping off someone.” He smiled. “She was so sloppy drunk I walked her to her door. Gotta say, I wasn’t expecting Baby Boy to fall out of a window like that.”

Pogue smiled. “Baby Boy.” He tasted the nickname and seemed to like it. “Alright, well, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Caleb waved an arm back at them before disappearing into the shadows to his car. He heard Pogue go back to worrying about whether or not Tyler could really be alright and just before he got into his car he heard his no longer best friend invite the brunet to stay with him rather than go to a hotel.

He closed the door and took a breath, hands on the steering wheel.

“They were looking for Reid.” He heard Tyler’s voice whisper as though he was right beside him. “Don’t do anything until we’ve talked about this.”

He opened his eyes to look in the rear view mirror to see Pogue walking Tyler to his bike.

He turned on the car and the engine rumbled. He needed to find out what had happened, why they had forgotten everything and who could have done something like that.


	15. Awake - Final

Caleb walked down the long corridor of the hotel toward his room, pulling the keycard out of his pocket just as he rounded the corner. A bellhop was standing in the hallway with a cart. It smelled like french fries and Caleb suppressed a smile. Reid had a habit of only eating side dishes if left to his own. There was probably a bottle of mustard and a plate of onion rings in there too.

He turned toward his door, considering whether or not he should make himself scarce before the other door opened. He waited long enough for the bellhop to knock and the door to swing open. He didn't look, fumbling with his keycard instead while the blond paid the bellhop and then, in mid sentence, noticed his new neighbor. “What the hell?” Were his first words and Caleb smiled at his door before flattening his lips innocently and turning, lifting an eyebrow in surprise before pretending to remember him. He still couldn't imagine how he had ever forgotten Reid.

He didn't know who had taken their memories and though he was certain he knew how to restore them in his brothers, Tyler had asked him to wait.

“Oh,” Caleb said with pretend discomfort at the sight of Reid. The blond walked around the cart and into the hallway, wearing only a pair of jeans that looked to have been tossed on for the sake of answering the door. His hair was a mess and his skin flushed. Again, Caleb had to repress a smile, wondering who was keeping Reid company in that room of his.

“Are you stalking me?” the blond demanded. The bellhop took his chance to leave.

Caleb stared back at him placidly. “Why would I stalk you?”

“You tell me, creep!” Reid shouted now. He never did like being the only one upset in a conversation.

“I got a room. It's not my fault you're staying in the same hotel.”

“Don't you have your own place?”

Caleb did smirk then. “Now who's the stalker?” He jabbed before shrugging. “It's being repainted.”

Reid scoffed. “Sure.”

Caleb opened his door and then stood in the frame, leaning against it. “Do you want to come in?” he offered boldly, grinning.

Reid scowled. “Fuck you.” He hissed before starting back toward his own room, pushing the cart to have it rolling inside. Someone in there said something but Caleb didn't catch it. Reid stopped in the doorway to turn back toward him, frowning when he saw Caleb still leaning in his doorway as though he knew he'd be back. “How did you know my name?”

“Someone told me,” he said. It wasn't a lie, not that he was opposed to lying to Reid.

“Bullshit,” the blond said.

“Why? You don't have friends?”

“I've only been in town for a week.”

Caleb frowned. Where had he been? Why had he assumed he was somehow here, close by, all the time that he couldn't remember him? “You leave an impression.”

Reid didn't seem flattered. “When you want to tell me the truth, you let me know,” he said flatly before going inside and slamming his hotel door.

Caleb stared at it for a moment before walking into his own and closing the door. He took out his phone and started scrolling through his contacts before he realized that the phone was a different one than he'd had last year and none of his brothers or their families were in his contact list. He frowned and dialed. He had always been good at remembering numbers.

It rang a few times before a woman answered in french.

“Mrs. Garwin,” Caleb said, sitting down in the leather chair by the window. “It's Caleb Danvers.”

She hesitated and he wondered if she would hang up. “Is he okay?”

“He doesn't know who I am,” he said flatly, not yet sure where she stood in all of this.

“But you do? You know, that is...” She sounded uncomfortable. She was like that. She was either uncomfortable or flirting. She wasn't the best of mothers but she loved her son.

“I don't know what happened.”

“I didn't do it,” she said quickly. “I didn't even know what they had done until it was over.”

“You took Reid away?”

“Yes.”

“Why is he back?” Caleb asked. It wasn't the most important thing but he wanted to know.

She was quiet for a few seconds, choosing her words maybe. “He's been sullen. He stopped going out. Stopped eating. Stopped doing anything. I tried everything, but nothing interested him. He was sad so I did what I knew would make him happy. I sent him back to you and Pogue and Tyler. I told him it was his father's university and that was why he should chose it.”

Caleb nodded slowly even though she couldn't see. “Who took our memories and why?”

He could hear her clutching at her phone.

“Mrs. Garwin...” he started.

“Tyler's mom wanted all of you killed. She said you had corrupted her son and one of you killed her husband.” She stammered and he could hear in her voice that she wanted to ask if it was true and if so, who had done it. She didn't know. He hadn't expected her to. “Tyler made her forget but it was too late. She had talked to the other families. They were gathering and they wanted answers. They were afraid the coven was going to turn on all of them...”

“How did they take our memories?”

She was quiet so he repeated the question.

“Please... He can't know I told you,” she begged, panic in her voice. He didn't like the sound of it. She wasn't his mother and he'd never cared for her much, but she was Reid's and he didn't like the idea of anything making her voice shake like that.

“I need to know,” Caleb said as softly as he could manage. He heard her swallow.

“He offered to take away your memories if they would make sure you all lived good lives separately when it was done. I don't know why he would do it. If Reid knew-”

“Mrs. Garwin...”

“It was Tyler,” she said and this time he was the one choking on truths. “He said it would be better this way.”

“No.” Caleb shook his head. “He didn't remember either--”

“He cursed himself when he was done with the rest of you,” she explained and he felt cold. “He said it was for the best. They told me it was his idea. Pogue's sister tried to argue against it but he wouldn't listen.”

“My mother?”

She hesitated and then replied sadly. “We never told her.”

Caleb sighed heavily but nodded to himself. That made sense. It wasn't like she was all that aware of what went on in his life.

“He's going to take your memories again.” She whispered a warning. “Don't let him know you remember.” She was quiet for another moment before saying goodbye.

He held onto the phone for a while after she hung up before putting it down on the desk in front of him.

He sat there for another five minutes before standing, pocketing his phone and leaving his hotel room.

* * *

Tyler buried fingers in the back of Pogue's hair, clutching at the strands close to the scalp and arching up against his body. Hours ago, this would have been his first time. He would have been nervous and over thinking and out of his mind with excitement. Hours ago, he hadn't remember who he was- not really and hours from now he'd be back to that. They all would be. But right now, his body sweaty and under Pogue's, he was just desperate for another moment.

“Harder,” he begged, body already pressed up against the headboard of Pogue's bed with his knees crowding his ears. He had one hand behind the back of Pogue's neck, holding on and watching him through half lidded, lust filled eyes. He was a traitor, he realized, and he was sick to steal another roll with Po while he still remembered but he couldn't resist.

“Fuck...” Pogue groaned, hips rocking to keep him thrusting against the other man, never losing a beat. “Starting to think... you're indestructible.” He panted with a laugh.

Tyler moaned and shivered beneath him, trying so hard to hold off his own pleasure. Pogue was an easy lover. He'd give you a quicky if you preferred or do you in just about every position you wanted until you'd had your fill. Tyler had gone for the latter tonight, one last go for the road, even if he wouldn't remember it.

Pogue had worked him hard. He had a stubbornness about never cumming first. It made him a favorite lover of more than just the covenant members.

“Come on,” Po urged, almost daring him to let go, lazy smile on his lips even with his hair sticking to his neck with sweat. “You've been blue balling yourself all night...” He whispered, another thrust having Tyler's hard on bounce against his own abdomen and force a hiss from his throat. “You're not going to outlast me,” he taunted and grinned wider when Tyler whimpered and shook his head.

“It's not like this is the last time you'll ever get it,” Po whispered, a hand letting go of one of Tyler's thighs to crawl across his skin, toward his dick, hips still bouncing off his ass. Tyler cringed at his words, body a mess of nerves and vision blurring. He reached out to grab at Tyler's hand, to try to stop it from getting a hold of his hard on. “You want to cum,” Po urged and Tyler could only shudder and nod, still holding onto his hand even when it wrapped around his cock and started stroking him in slow, solid pumps.

He had evaded all of Pogue's attempts to get him off directly before but he was losing the strength to resist his own pleasure. It was going to be the last time. Not his last time having sex, but probably his last time having sex with Pogue. What were the chances they would meet a third time?

His body spasmed between the headboard and Pogue's, his teeth grinding and his lids pressing shut when his orgasm swept over him, for a moment drowning him. Pogue moaned, the sound rattling deep in his chest before he followed him over the edge, leaning his forehead to the headboard and staying there for a while, leaned against him and catching his breath. “Fuck, baby boy. You just took gold.” He purred.

Tyler smirked. “That would be quite the compliment if you remembered the others.”

Pogue was in the process of getting up and off of his new lover, crawling off the bed to find a towel that he could toss back to the brunet. “What?” He laughed. “I don't forget my bed buddies. Now, I don't always know their names, but I don't forget them.”

Tyler stood, his legs shaking and used the already dirty towel to wipe his own cum off his chest. It was just like Pogue to live in mild squalor. He didn't care enough to clean and he had a habit of sleeping with maids- no matter their age or gender- which often resulted in no one cleaning his apartment. “You never do change, I guess,” he said to himself and this time Pogue turned to look at him, pushing strands of sweaty hair out of his face.

“What are you talking about? We have definitely not met before today. I would remember.” He assured with another laugh.

Tyler stared at him, dropping the towel on the floor.

Pogue stared back and slowly his smile faded.

“I'm sorry, Po,” he whispered.

The blond shivered, his arms felt heavy and it was getting hard to breathe. “What have you done?” he whispered before he watched those eyes burn black and his body collapsed out from under him.

Tyler caught his fall enough to turn him and have him collapsing onto the mattress. He shivered and stepped back, staring at him for another moment before hurrying to get dressed and collect all of his things. He wouldn't remember him when he woke up. He wouldn't remember seeing Reid or meeting Caleb either. His life would be back to normal.

He was almost out the door when his phone vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out and flipped it open, frowning at the number without a contact name connected to it. He knew the number. With a swipe of his thumb he answered, lifting it to his ear while stepping out of Pogue's place. The door swung shut behind him. “Hey. Where are you? We need to meet.”

“There's a park nearby. The one on third,” Caleb said before hanging up.

* * *

When Tyler got to the park Caleb was already there, standing near a fountain with his hands in the pockets of his jeans. He was wearing a different t-shirt than the one he'd been in before, this one was light gray. It was warm out even though it was dark and he turned when he heard him coming. Some anxious part of Tyler told him to do it now, before Caleb could realize what he'd done but in those eyes he saw that it was too late.

“Baby boy,” Caleb said, shoulders tense.

Tyler stopped just out of arms reach, staring back at him. “Did you find Reid?” He made conversation to avoid the inevitable.

Caleb shrugged. “He thinks I'm a creep.”

Tyler smiled a little. “I'm sure you'll win him over.”

“How am I going to do that when he doesn't know who I am?” Caleb asked coldly. “How am I going to do that when I won't remember who he is?”

Tyler felt his mouth pulling down into a frown. “It was the best choice, Cay.”

“You really did it, then?” Caleb exhaled disbelief. “You stole from us?”

“I didn't steal anything. I was just--”

“You took us away from each other!” Caleb shouted suddenly, the sound and anger bursting up from inside of him. “Ty, they don't know who we are! They're alone!”

“No!” Tyler snapped back. “They have their families and they'll make friends and lovers! Normal ones!”

Caleb pressed his shoulders down and swallowed some of his fury, staring at the youngest. “You think you're protecting them?”

“All of you.”

Caleb shook his head. “You think bad things won't happen just because we aren't together?” He clawed a hand through his hair. “It just means we won't be there to protect each other. We don't even know we can use to save ourselves. You would have died when you fell out of that damn window!”

Tyler cringed, tears stinging his eyes. “He doesn't remember! It's better this way!”

“Who? Reid?” He snapped before grinding his teeth. “It's about that again?”

“ _That_? Yeah, it's about that!” Tyler shouted and someone out walking their dog hurried passed. “My mom and Pogue's family were digging around! They wanted revenge for that bastard and-”

“And you could have made them all forget it like you did your mom! You could have protected us rather than them!”

“It wasn't about that! It was a chance to put things right. It was a chance to make a world where it never happened.” Tyler was struggling to breathe right, tears burning tracks down his cheeks. “I didn't want to remember.”

“Then _you_ forget!” Caleb roared. “You don't take us from each other just to clear your conscience!”

Tyler's lips peeled back to snarl at his brother angrily. “You're just selfish!” he snapped before his eyes went black. Caleb inhaled, too late, but before that heavy weight could settle into his limbs and the darkness form over his memories, Tyler was tossed from his feet and into the grass.

He landed with an roll, panting and struggling to his feet. He turned to look in surprise. Reid was standing at the edge of the park with eyes like midnight edged in flames.

Tyler looked at Caleb, more hurt than angry. “You woke him.”

Caleb nodded slowly, Reid walking passed him on his way to the brunet in the grass. Tyler stood just in time to have his body seize up. Unable to move, he stared at the blacks of Reid's eyes. “I...”

“How did you get me the first time?” Reid asked almost casually.

“What?”

Reid pushed his hands into his pockets. “You got Caleb and Pogue the same way you almost got him again just now--it's against his nature to use against you.” Reid smiled at his brother and his best friend. “But I used to use on you all the time.”

"What? No you didn't--”

“I used during sex all the time and to play pranks on you and--”

“You were asleep,” Tyler explained, cutting off the parade of reminders. “You were asleep when my mom called. You looked peaceful. Like nothing had happened...so I got the idea--”

“To separate us?”

“It wasn't about that,” Tyler said, eyes shining with frustrated tears.

Reid nodded and took a deep breath, standing in front of their youngest brother. “It was a betrayal, Baby Boy.”

Tyler shook his head, desperate for it not to be true. “No. I was taking care of us. We killed someone. I killed someone.”

Reid stared back at him for a long time before he nodded slowly. “You want to forget.”

“I want it to have never happened,” Tyler hissed. “I want him to have never existed.” A tear rolled down his cheek. “But I can't make that happen so I did the next best thing.”

Reid took a deep breath and then let it out slowly, touching his best friend's cheek. “Alright.”

“Reid,” Caleb growled between clenched teeth.

Fire sizzled in the corners of Reid's black eyes and Tyler vanished.

Caleb balled his fists, watching the blond tensely. “What did you do?”

“I put him to bed. He's in the hotel room asleep.” He turned around to look at Caleb, his eyes frosty blue again. “He won't remember what he did, not to us or to his step-father. We'll put it back to normal for him,” Reid sounded decisive. It had always been a dangerous sound for the blond.

“What if he remembers?” Caleb whispered.

Reid shrugged one shoulder. “He doesn't want to so he won't. We'll be together, so he won't be missing anything.”

Caleb nodded slowly. It wasn't ideal but it might just be the best they could do. “And the families?”

Reid smiled and there was nothing nice about it. “We'll pay them a visit in the morning. It's mostly Po's family so we'll let him decide how to handle it.”

Caleb sighed, burdened by the mess they had woken up to. He scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Po. He doesn't remember.”

Reid blinked back at him, surprise to realize that they hadn't woken Pogue yet and then grinning wide.

Caleb frowned in order to balance out that smile. “What?” he asked, sounding irritated already.

“We should wake him up, should we?” He took those few steps left between them and somehow the tragedy of their year lost was forgotten. Pale fingers tugged at Caleb's belt loop, pulling at his hip. “Unless you want to deal with families and set up a house of memories for Ty while I go wake Po up...” Reid said coyly beneath a smirk.

Caleb tried to hold onto his frown. He preferred to look unaffected by Reid's games but after a year without it, he couldn't be any weaker for it. He watched those blue eyes turn black before the man in front of him vanished all together, leaving Caleb standing alone in the park in the night.

He smiled when his lover wasn't there to see it. Whatever troubles they had left would be nothing so long as they could take them on together.

He vanished and no one was there to see.

* * *

Pogue woke in the middle of the night feeling as though he had forgotten something. He got up, restless, and made his way into the living room. He flicked on the tv and rolled through channels aimlessly before turning it off and going to the kitchen, bare feed padding across linoleum floors. He opened the door to the refrigerator but there was only beer and some string cheese inside. He wasn't sure why he had expected anything else.

He closed the refrigerator door just when he heard a knocking at his front door. He looked at the clock hanging crooked on the wall to see that it was four in the morning. He crossed his living room to unlock and open the door only to find his porch empty. For half a second he thought he might have been hearing things, and then he closed the door and turned around to see a blond guy standing in his house. “What the fuck?” Pogue snapped on impulse before letting out a low laugh that was more of a threat than an encouragement. “If you think you're going to find something to steal here...”

Reid snorted, standing by the couch in his t-shirt and jeans. “I didn't come for your collection of vintage porn rags or your greasy tools.”

Pogue blinked at him. He looked familiar but he couldn't place him. “Do I know you?”

Reid smiled, looking Pogue over. He was wearing a pair of sweats that hung low on his hips. “Do you want to?”

Pogue let out a breath of laughter but took a step closer, head tipping to one side. “You're either the best hooker or the worst thief,” he commented, eyes hazing over a little when he watched the beautiful stranger strip off his shirt. He was lean and pale. He was familiar. Before he could think better of it he reached out to an old thin scar along Reid's ribs. He remembered it when it was fresh. He remembered it bleeding through Reid's shirt when he was eight and fell off a fence. His hand jerked back and he looked at those blue eyes. “I don't understand.”

Reid's smile broke into a laugh. “What's to understand? It's not your first time.” His fingers hooked into the front of Po's sweats and pushed them down, dropping to his knees.

Pogue sucked in a breath, letting it out in a moan when he felt that mouth working his cock into action, licking and sucking along the length before swallowing it. His eyes closed and his head swam. He was dreaming. This was a dream. That made sense. As much play as Pogue had, a stranger showing up in his living room to blow him was still far fetched for reality.

His hand cradled the back of the blonds head. Dream or not, he wasn't going to spoil this for himself. His eyes opened half way to look down at him, watching that blond head work back and forth over his cock. Eyes looked up at him through lashes and black flashed over blues making his nerves tense before everything relaxed.

Pogue blinked as though his eyes were adjusting, reeling for a moment before using his hand on the back of Reid's skull to draw him back and off his cock. He was still evening out his breath, rolling through the mess of memories suddenly laid out in his thoughts and Reid was staring at him with that lazy, horny gaze. “What the fuck did you do this time?” Po muttered. Why had he forgotten who his friends were?

He turned his head, looking to his bedroom when he remembered having been with Tyler earlier that night. Caleb was there on his bed now, stretched out with his arms behind his head and dark eyes watching the show they'd put on. “Baby boy...” he started before groaning when that mouth of Reid's licked a path up his cock again.

“I'm blowing you and you're talking about Tyler, Po... If I didn't love him too I'd be pretty pissed,” Reid muttered before wrapping his mouth around Pogue's dick again, sucking harder now, pretending to be angry.

Pogue moaned and closed his eyes again for another minute, giving in to that pleasure before forcing himself to focus again, eyes opening and head turning to look into his bedroom again at Caleb. “Everything's alright?” he asked his best friend because they had a long standing “no bullshit” policy.

Caleb nodded shortly, eyes glazed with lust and the front of his jeans bulging.

Pogue groaned and then grinned. That was enough information for now. “Good.” He pushed Reid off his dick by his forehead this time and before the blond could spit curses, he bent over and grabbed him up, lifting him up over his shoulder before carrying him into the bedroom. “I feel like it's been forever since I fucked you,” he mumbled, dumping him onto the mattress between Caleb's legs.

“Who says you get to-” Reid started, grabbing at Caleb's jean clad thighs for leverage to get himself up onto all fours just in time to have Pogue pushing him back down. The larger blond snaked an arm around Reid's front to undo his jeans before using both hands to rip them down his legs and toss them off the bed.

Reid hissed at the challenge and started to turn when Caleb caught his arms, holding him forward. His head whipped ahead again to stare back at Caleb, surprised and then grinning. “You're taking his side?” He said it like it was a bad idea, like he didn't completely love it. He opened his mouth to say something else but when Po pressed two fingers into his ass he shut up, his mouth open but only making mewling sounds.

Caleb smiled and moved both of Reid's wrists into one hand. He knew he wasn't really fighting this but he also knew that sometimes when Reid was like this, he enjoyed being restrained. His eyes flashed black to get rid of his own clothes, his newly freed dick hitting Reid in the chest.

Po had started moving three fingers in him, pushing in a steady rhythm to have Reid humming pleasantly between them, momentarily distracted. Caleb lifted the wrists he'd gathered and pulled them toward the headboard, forcing both of his lovers to scoot forward until Reid was straddling his lap, their cocks rubbing together.

Pogue kissed at the back of Reid's neck, biting softly at his skin. “Say something,” the larger blond urged, his voice deep with want. “Ask for it. Beg for it.”

Reid curled his lips back despite the moans in his chest, eyes opening a little. “Fuck you.”

Pogue grinned against his brother's shoulder. “That'll do,” he said before pulling his fingers free and filling Reid's ass with his stiff cock, pushing up all the way to have the smaller blond straining between them and groaning. He tried to pull his arms free then only to realize that Caleb still had control of them in one hand, his other grabbing onto their cocks to start pumping them together.

Reid faked a struggle. Squirming and gasping, because moving only made things better. Pogue built a steady pace, pulling almost completely out before shoving himself all the way in again, moaning in Reid's ear. “Do you want more, sweetheart?” Pogue murmured against the shell of his ear.

Reid was half delirious on the edge of his own pleasure. He couldn't imagine what more Pogue had but he never shied away from a challenge. “Y-yes! Fuck!”

Pogue grinned over his shoulder to Caleb and then used a hard thrust to push him forward against the brunet’s chest, his dick sliding over Caleb's until it was alone and pressed to his stomach. “What the-” He started to complain but then Pogue pulled out of him and when he pushed against his ass again, he wasn't alone.

Reid's eyes widened and his mouth opened to protest. Caleb was just grinning, looking wicked and pleased. Pogue grabbed the smaller blond by the neck and pulled him back against his chest, forcing him to sit upright and then lowering him slowly, stretching him to fit both of their dicks. When he took the last centimeter, all three let out a shivered moan and Reid couldn't remember words let alone his desire to form them.

Caleb had hold of his thighs now, using them to help lift and lower Reid between them until he was bouncing, body twitching in Pogue's hold and eyes too filled with lust to see. Before either of them could think to take care of Reid's neglected cock, the blond was cringing and whimpering, his load shooting onto Caleb's chest and his mouth working for sounds that might have been words somewhere in his mind.

Pogue and Caleb moaned at the sight and kept him bouncing a few more times before following.

Pogue was the only one left with enough sense to clean up before they collapsed. Reid was asleep as soon as he hit the sheets and Caleb stayed awake long enough to explain what had happened to their last year to Pogue. The long haired blond nodded distantly in the end. He'd pay his relative a visit tomorrow and put their memories straight and then they'd come up with some nice ones to make up for Tyler's missing year.


End file.
